


Ripping off the veil

by regnumveritatis



Series: Star Wars meets Shallow Hal [1]
Category: Shallow Hal (2001), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Catholic Rosary, Disfigurement, Epiphanies, F/M, Insecure Luke, Inspired by a Movie, Language of Flowers, Literary References & Allusions, Manipulative Sheev Palpatine, Meet the Family, Morning After, Parents Han and Leia, Past Relationship(s), Past Underage, Psychological Trauma, Rey Kenobi, Rogue Squadron, War Veteran Luke Skywalker, Young Rey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-28
Updated: 2017-07-04
Packaged: 2018-09-02 20:50:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 16
Words: 21,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8682919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/regnumveritatis/pseuds/regnumveritatis
Summary: Shallow Hal AU: Mara Jade is a ballerina teacher and part time martial arts coach who is best defined in three sentences1. Extremely loyal to her close-knit circle.2. Classy even when kicking the crap out of someone.3. Impractically centered on looks when choosing men.But that all changes when an impromptu meeting with renowned life coach Qui-Gon Jinn hypnotizes her into only seeing a person's inner beauty.





	1. Prologue

New York, 1997  
A nine year old girl named Mara Jade sits on a hard plastic chair in a hospital while gentling brushing a Barbie ballerina. Inside the hospital room doctors are performing surgery on her great-uncle Sheev Palpatine. She's resisting the growing impulse to barge into the room. Great uncle says she's a lady and ladies always do the proper thing, even if the rest of the world doesn't know what that means. A nurse asks Mara for her parent's phone numbers, they can stay in work for all she cares. Great uncle needs family support, not nuisances who'll criticize him for getting hit by lightning while driving. Her parents are more concerned with their careers than raising a child so great uncle is the one who watches over Mara every day. She got the role of Clara in her ballet recital when she was seven, to celebrate great uncle went to a toymaker and ordered a custom Barbie ballerina, with red hair just like hers. Mommy accused him of spoiling her and keeping her a child, at least uncle Sheev is around to spoil her!!! Just for that, she'll keep the doll forever and ever. Mara played Clara for a whole week, mom and dad failed to attend a single show. He'll be fine, no doubt about it. Great uncle will spend a month or two on a wheelchair, she'll nurse him back to health and he'll host their special tea parties in which the Emperor kisses every inch of her body, or as he calls it "bestowing my favor upon the fairest of Maidens". Maybe he can explain why she's not supposed to tell anyone about their game when he gets better. It's not like her parents ever ask what they do together. Those simpleton laborers have the basic intelligence to acknowledge she is in capable hands. According to great uncle, grandma's natural grace and intellect skipped a generation in the family, she believes him beyond any doubt. Sheev Palpatine is an Emperor among men, nothing stops him. She repeats that mantra over and over again as the hours pass and the doctors don't come out. He has to recover, the Emperor is immortal!!! Un-rivaled in this measly earth!!! After what seems an eternity but was only six hours one surgeon steps out of the room. She smoothens the wrinkles in her skirt and walks towards him, her calm demeanor expertly hiding the desperation underneath. When grandmother Satine was alive, she taught her that it's important to look your best even when you feel your worst. "Hysterical sobbing deforms the face and leaves your weakness out in the open" she said. Courtesy armors the spirit and beautifies you in front of the world, that is the mark of a real woman. She dons her coat of arms, it serves her well as the doctor calmly explains that Sheev Palpatine will not live past the hour. He lets her in so they can say their goodbyes. Next to the Emperor, machines beep on their distorted notes. The face she loves is wrapped with gauze. Irrelevant, let his splendour be blocked from all undeserving plebeian eyes. She is his and he is hers alone.

" Come closer, my lady" he beckons, his voice tired in a way she's never heard before. She runs to him, she would fly if she could. There is nothing she can deny him, lest his Grace be forced to rely on underlings. He gathers his fading strenght to press his hands onto hers. So loving, even as death saps his presence away from her. His head turns to face her, she hones all her focus on him. Nothing else matters more than this, their last moment together. No power on hell, heaven or earth will change that. They can chop off her legs and she'll still pay attention to him. Mortality will not grant them much longer.

"Listen carefully my darling Hand, your grandmother feared a life of spinsterhood. As a result she settled for an oafish husband and produced that ode to stupidity you are obliged to call Father. By work of providence, her gifts passed on to you. The Jade's family shining exemption from the mediocrity they so love. Your father wed a scullery maid and sired a nymph, you must find a man of legend so that you may give birth to a God. Only then will our family's blood be cleansed from all impurity. Will you carry out my bidding, dear one?"

She swears it shall be so, honored to be chosen for preserving his legacy. By state law Jade is her surname, but it will be the Kryze and Palpatine names she will uphold. He smiles at her as his heart stops beating. Medics hastily push her aside as they work to keep him alive. Electricity is sent in shocking blows to his chest. All for naught, Sheev Palpatine departs to enter a new reality. She pictures him as an angel in Heaven, God sends him to the everlasting flames. Later that day, the oaf's spawn and the scullery maid come to pick her up and cremate the Emperor's shell. In the haze of their self-centered lives, they never find out about the _"tea parties".The_ former senator's corpse is still grinning.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We move from the past to the present. The little girl, now a woman unlucky in love receives a gift from an unexpected source.

New York, 2016  
It's official: her no-good, workaholic parents cursed their only daughter from their graves.   _I should have buried them at sea instead of next to Grandma & Grandpa but nooooo I had to go soft after spending three weeks visiting my egg and sperm donor in a fancy hospital I paid the bills for._They never got over the fact that Great Uncle Sheev left her every dime of the Palpatine family fortune. Without so much as a nickel for his nephew and niece in-law. She didn't ask for the money!!! He never even mentioned it to her. But there's no way her week could have been so disastrous without some sort of hex. Then again the curse could have been cast by her best friend's ex-boyfriend. Filth excels at spreading lies and damnation. On Monday some female charlatans named Barriss Offee and Assaj Ventress had the gall to claim that Sheev Palpatine sexually abused them. If they had just accused her great uncle with no evidence then it would have been insignificant, but the harlots brought falsified _photographs_ and fake _videos_  that leaked into the Internet. Her emperor once warned that no truth is more shamelesly bent than mankind's. His words ring true as statements from tatooed strumpets besmirch a hero. Tarnishing his public image to the point where her cousin Korkie was  _ **kindly suggested**_ by the mayor's office to remove his statue in the Capitol. And that's just her family issues. Rey Kenobi's caretaker Unkar Plutt called on Wednesday to tell her that the little girl couldn't attend ballet class due to chickenpox. Thing is Rey's medical records stated that she had been vaccinated against chickenpox. Following her gut feeling that something was wrong, she stalked Unkar until she found out where he lived and _**possibly**  _broke into his house. There she discovered Rey's real reason for skipping class all week long was a broken leg, graciously provided by her legal guardian. The egregious manatee caught her sneaking Rey out the window and tried to hit them, but he didn't take her martial arts training into account. Now Rey sends her brightly colored postcards from her grandfather's( who was unaware of his granddaughter's existence till now) farm in the middle of nowhere & they continue her studies through Skype. In the movies, doing this sort of thing gets you a medal and newspaper headlines, in real life it gets you suspended from teaching ballet. It's a good thing she works for fun, not necessity.

This all piles up to Friday when she thought to surprise her boyfriend Hux by preparing a nice candlelit dinner. She showed at his apartment where lo and behold,  _working late_ meant lying in bed with his secretary Miss Phasma. Honestly, it's bad enough that he cheated on her but did it have to be so cliche? She gives up the positive act and calls Winter who promises a stress free night of Netflix and ice cream. Tomorrow, because tonight her best friend is still visiting family in some godforsaken place that's not on Google maps. She could ask Lando to hang out but since it's the beginning of the weekend, he'll be too busy flirting with every 20ish year old specimen in the city while moaning about Han Solo, _the ultimate wingman who abandoned the bachelor life for some princess in a backwater town_. If this Han guy exists, he's smarter than most people. So now she's checking out books from the library in hopes of drowning her sorrows in Tennyson, Goethe and Marlowe.

As she's walking into the library's elevator, a tall man with shoulder length hair stops the door from closing with one hand. The other is holding a worn down copy of Sir Walter Scott's Rob Roy. He seems oddly familiar for some reason. Not neighborhood familiar, more like TV show familiar. Then it clicks.

"Excuse me Sir, are you Qui-Gon Jinn?"

"Indeed I am, who do I have the pleasure of meeting?"

"Mara, Mara Jade. You know my friend Kyle has your book; Listening to the Will of the Force. He says it changed his perspective. "

" That was the intention, I'm glad your friend responded positively to it."

"So what brings you to New York?"

"I'm hosting a seminar on how healthy attachments are vital to a happy, well adjusted lifestyle for veterans struggling with PTSD."

"Good, our boys deserve some happiness of their own after fighting to ensure ours."

All of a sudden, the elevator begins to shake. The lights turn off as the emergency power activates dim neon yellow flares. Qui-Gon tenderly rubs her back as he assures her everything will be fine.  _Why are all the nice, gorgeous men married?_ Well then, looks like they're stuck in the elevator till further notice. Which apparently means all night. No wonder the Communists protest against laziness in the American government. They end up discussing their love lives. Qui-Gon has been happily married to a blind linguist named Tahl for almost thirty years and has two children: Ahsoka and Kanan. Compared to him, Mara's a raging hurricane.

" Miss Jade, I'd like to know: what is your idea of a perfect man?"

"Nigel Terry's height, Rutger Hauer's eyes, Timothy Dalton's chin, Errol Flynn's hair, Sebastian Stan's cheekbones and Marlon Brando's abs before he fattened up."

"Miss Jade, if you constantly seek comforts of the flesh over the psyche you'll spend the rest of your life unsatisfied with what you settle for."

"Compliance's not in my nature, I'll not wed a branch when I want the tree."

"Then how about I help you find someone who is your match in every way, a soul mate if you will?"

"A Prince among men?"

"If we do this correctly, you'll steal a King's heart, Miss Jade."

"Show me the way, I'm ready Qui-Gon."   _Please my Emperor, be proud of me._

"Think of a time you were unforgivably shallow. Don't roll your eyes at me, just do it. Now release your prejudice into the air. From this moment on whenever you meet someone you shall only see what lies within. You're gazing into the eyes of a man, you're feeling his heart, you're glimpsing his spirit. Good, very good. That's it."


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qui-Gon's gift opens Mara to a whole new dating experience. Winter tells the truth without holding back and a hectic morning turns into a lovely afternoon thanks to Luke Skywalker.

On Saturday Winter arrives with a batch of her aunt Breha's blueberry muffins and a pint of Baskin-Robbins. Her best friend had never liked Hux, despite his well-to do social status and stellar looks. Or any man Mara's dated for that matter. She'd be pissed about it, if Winter's super powered jerk-detector hadn't proven its accuracy 99 percent of the time (even that time, the guy was a sleazeball: just not a heterosexual one). All things considered, Winter Celchu is a great person and an amazing friend. It's a shame she's an only child, she would gladly date a Celchu brother (as long as he was easy on the eyes of course). Sadly, Winter can't use her super weapon on herself due to the fact she's still letting her parents pick out dates for her. Granted, most of them are decent fellows with respectable incomes and table manners who _**actually**  _want kids but they're so dull a piece of integral bread seems more invigorating than these cubicle lovers. She craves fire, her parents send her mud. Whereas Mara seeks enlightment and uncovers frustration.

"You know Mara, now that you're only working part time maybe my folks can arrange a few suitors for you. They love you ever since you beat up my ex, whom my parent's didn't choose ergo not a excuse for saying no."

" Winter, your last date was Rick Moranis's clone."

" How is it possible for someone to spend their Christmas vacation volunteering at Graham Windham teaching self-defense to abused children, annually donate their bonus to St. Jude's, attend Catholic Church weekly, work every summer with Greenpeace and still be inconceivably shallow?"

" Not you too, that Jinn guy I spent all Friday night cooped up in the elevator with, also said I was shallow. Although, he supposedly cured me of my _wretched vanity_ so I could find my soul mate. I think it worked, immediately after I left the library, I caught a cab with this hunk. Then I got the hottest pizza delivery guy in history. "

" What'd he do, exorcise your great uncle's ghost from you?"

"Winter, I am going to ignore your last comment in order to avoid a homicide at 7:00 am."

They eat breakfast in silence. Mara knows there was no ill bearing in her friend's quip but too many people have ridiculed her great uncle recently. She'll make it up to Winter tonight, she can have complete control over Netflix. Right now though, her bff is momentarily set aside as she scrambles for a taxi. Sabine Wren, one of her co-workers called at 6:00 to ask if she could sub for Saturday rehearsals since Bo-Katan Wren's cancer shot up. While she loves having her job back for a while, Mara deeply wishes it was under happier circumstances. However, wishing doesn't ease the gaping heartache. That's what work is for. Next time, she's taking the subway. That way she can avoid running in ballet flats for three blocks at 8:30 in the morning. Her girls were all happy to see their instructor, they've been practicing so hard. Other than Jessica Pava inquiring about Rey, the class itself was uneventful. Rehearsals end at 12:00 and she browses the web to see if the eye patch on great-uncle's statue she saw on the way here is real or just paranoia. As usual, destiny picks the worst conclusion and the internet reveals the eye patch is accompanied by zits and a graffiti bra. Still dressed in her fuchsia skirted leotard, she empties her locker, shoves all her stuff in her bag and races to see if the culprit remains. At the crime scene, a figure is crouching over the statue of Sheev Palpatine's contemporary Yoda Masters. She throws him an axe kick, he falls on the ground in a flash.

"Miss, with all due respect I'd like to know what I did to deserve a kung fu attack."

"You earned my Jiu Jitsu attack by vandalizing history!!!"

"It was like that when I got here!!! I'm just cleaning up Yoda's statue. Some pervert drew a bra on all the statues. Haven't reached Palpatine yet, Mace Windu took me a while. _Sorry_ _for keeping the area clean."_  

He stays on the floor as he talks to her, careful to keep his back turned while his arms stretch through the earth. Almost like he's trying to find something. Doesn't look like he dropped anything. Unless that huge sweater, turtle neck or baggy pants have more compartments. Who wears a sweater in the middle of August? This isn't Alaska, it's 90 degrees today. The damn thing's so thick she can barely see his.... **hand.**  Oh shit, he's searching for his prosthetic. She opens his bag, hoping for a spare but all he has in there is cleaning supplies (crap, he was telling the truth), a flip phone, a Victor Hugo novel, some granola bars, medication for chronic pain and an **Iraq war purple heart** cap. Holy smokes, she face kicked an armless veteran. Now would be a good time for the earth to swallow her whole. _Great uncle would be ashamed of me._ Her mental self flagellation is cut short by a small shadow behind Finis Valorum's statue. For once, fate looks kindly upon her as she retrieves his artificial limb. 

"I found your prosthetic. Words can't describe how sorry I am, if there's any way I can make it up to you....."

He turns to take back his hand. She is met with the most breathtaking face she's ever seen. If Philip the Handsome was half as ravishing then the nature of Joan the Mad's obsession is a mystery to her no more. She'd drag his body over Europe anyday. His hair is spun gold, his eyes are mazarine blue, he is neither giant or midget. Eat your heart out Qui-Gon Jinn, my fantasy man exists!!! _My Emperor, I have found a godly man. Is this pleasing to you? Let Apollo satisfy our needs as Orpheus plays the lyre of love._

"Miss, I'm not offended. It was just a misunderstanding."

"Let me buy you lunch, it'll clear my conscience. Free dessert in exchange for your name."

"I'm Luke Skywalker. And you can stop the pity flirting now. It gets old pretty quick."

"Well, Luke Skywalker I'm Mara Jade and pity flirting is a phrase I've never heard of before, much less used."

"You actually want to be seen with me? In broad daylight, wearing a pink leotard? Is this a joke?"

"Just accept before I end up purchasing a horde of gift baskets for you."

"Fine, lunch. But don't say I didn't warn you."

They go to this French bistro and Luke opens the door for her. And keeps it open for the old lady going out. He takes off his coat and gives it to her when he sees her shivering. His sleeves are so long they hide his palm. How is he not melting? The sweater's a lot comfier than she thought it would be. When she thanks him for it, he says it's nothing. Polite, handsome, smart, funny and humble: where has he been hiding all her life? They fall into a easy conversation. Turns out he's an Opera fan. Even more surprising, he actually saw her when she played Sleeping Beauty last year and went again to see her dance but a different ballerina performed instead. She explains how she's a teacher and only performed that day cause the understudy was sick. He replies that the understudy should consider a vacation so she could dance more often. Mara kisses his cheek, he looks at her like she's a miracle. The waitress's perky attitude is reduced to a gasp when she sees them. Luke's hesitant smile disappears as the waitress fidgets while taking their order. 

"Guess she's not used to serving men with killer good looks."

"Her reaction was mild, I get worse feedback from toddlers. Change of topics: are you allowed to drink that chocolate milkshake you ordered cause I thought dancers had this unrelenting diet plan. "

" We can splurge every now and then. Don't believe all that diehard healthnut propaganda. "

She asks if his girlfriend is some notorious calorie counter. Her heart skips a beat when he says he's single. Whoever crippled his self-esteem to the point his tone indicates assuming otherwise is impossible better watch out if she runs into him/her. Maybe it's the one arm situation. Losing a limb is pretty traumatizing. Luke joined the army at nineteen, he was honorably discharged three years later. While Mara was studying in Julliard, Luke was recovering from a dirty bomb blast. He spent two months in a coma, when he woke up doctors had amputated his hand and his body was covered in third degree burns combined with shrapnel. Lesser men would have committed suicide. Luke is grateful to be alive. Although she could have sworn the type of injuries he described left people severely disfigured. The army doesn't cover reconstructive surgery and Luke's family can't afford it. He says they're farmers, old school farmers. Guess he got the million dollar explosion. When they finish lunch, she gives back his coat and he buys a sandwich which is promptly given to the homeless man on the street. 

" That was very nice of you."

"Not as nice as your company. You more than made up for that first impression."

"Well, next time I promise to ask questions before kicking people in the face."

"I'm happy you kicked me, this is the closest thing to a date I've had in four years."

"I could take you out on a real date this thursday if you want. We're going to the Metropolitan Art Museum. But you'd have to meet my best friend. No worries though, you might be the first guy she actually likes me dating. Can I have your phone number?"

"Uh sure, let's see how far we can stretch the miracle. This is my number, call me when you figure out the details."

"Great, I'll see you soon."

"Mara?......"

"Yeah farmboy?"

"If I don't hear from you, I appreciate everything anyway."


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lando freaks out, Winter ships it and love is in the air.

She circles Thursday in her calendar and calls Luke on Monday, hoping a day is long enough to avoid looking stalkerish. The obvious bewilderment in his voice baffles her. They talk for several hours and lose track of the time. Luke is an angel somehow unaware of his radiance. If anything the man thinks he's a broken gargoyle. What they do teach in Naboo, Montana? Self-loathing 101? There must be something in the water nowadays harming the men cause Lando's acting really strange, albeit for entirely different reasons. Her friend has lowered his dating standards with no logical explanation. They went for drinks on Sunday, Mara danced with these super-studs working in Autism Speaks Winter dragged out of the office. Lando pulled her away from them, under the pretense of "Saving her from the kingdom of dweebs". Winter said that she was proud of her finally "overcoming her shallowness" and baked her cranberry cookies to celebrate. She didn't correct her best friend, those cookies are too good to pass. Then this really attractive chick at Olive Garden flirted with Lando and he barely looked at the girl. At least Kyle is behaving normally when they teach Jiu Jitsu on Tuesday. Winter helps her pick an outfit on Thursday with no enthusiasm whatsoever. Given her past boyfriend experiences, Mara can't blame her. Lando drives them to the museum since he's the only one with a car. Luke promised to drive them back so Lando can leave when he shows up.

"Why are you doing this to yourself again Mara? Couldn't you just date one of the guys from the bar, they were nice."

"Can't you at least act excited, Lando's more high-spirited about today than you. "

" Lando thinks this is you going back to normal. I liked your new outlook on people more."

"This guy is incredible. He's cultured, sweet, funny and plays the piano with one hand. He volunteers at the V.A and teaches flying to disabled teenagers."

"You just described my cousin who I know you're never going out with. Are you reading my mail to invent a story for this guy? "

"I thought all your cousins were girls, don't you have twelve aunts or something?"

"I have nine aunts, just tell me what the bastard looks like so I can get this over with."

The two women look around for someone with Luke's features. Traffic at this hour is diabolical so Mara doesn't worry about him being ten minutes late. Winter decides to grab a cup of tea from the nearby vendor. The next thing Mara hears is her friend shriek, the bursting with joy type of shriek folks do when they win the lottery. She finds Winter hugging Luke, who is still covered in too many layers. Apparently Luke is the same cousin her friend thought she'd never date.  _You had a sexy, intelligent, chivalrous man available & you didn't share. Winter, you are in so much trouble when I get home!!!_ For now she'll let it slide, Luke's smile when he finds out Winter's the aforementioned friend is too beautiful to ruin. Lando continues to act abnormally when he jumps at the sight of Luke, like a kid watching a horror movie. And just like that, the smile is gone and he pulls up the hood of his sweater. Winter asks Luke for the tea she never bought and punches Lando once her cousin's distracted. Of all the weird behavior going on lately, Winter's punch is definitely the best. Lando leaves with a black eye. Luke comes back with Winter's tea and a berry smoothie Mara had offhandedly mentioned as a favorite in their first conversation. Damn, this guy is thoughtful. They roam the museum for a couple of hours, Luke avoids crowds like the plague. When she gets home, she's reading up on PSTD. Mara takes his hand and races him to the Edward Blair Leighton exhibit, the smile returns. Winter leaves early and hugs them both before calling a cab, despite Luke's offer to drive. Subtlety was never her style.

"Luke: would you still go out with me if I rattled Winter a little cause she could have spared me three years of douche-bags by bringing you to dinner."

"Don't be too hard on my cousin, she was just watching out for me. But keep the kick-ass personality, you just might survive my sister that way."

"How is isolating you from me the same as protecting you?"

"By not setting me on unrealistic goals, she keeps me sane. Are you free for the rest of the day?"

"Yeah, my greenpeace shift ended at July and being suspended from work means you have a lot of time on your hands."

"Good cause I know some kids who would love ballet lessons."

They drive to Rochester where they enter a camping site by showing Luke's volunteer card. She gets entry as a plus one. It's certainly spacious though she can't understand why there's so many nurses and guards everywhere. The staff provides her with ballet shoes and a leotard. Not as good as her own but they'll do nicely. A social worker verifies her credentials and asks if she's prone to squeamishness, fainting spells or throwing up. Turns out the camp is run by the University's Medical Center which is why security is so tight. She gets a little possessive when the brunette nurse warmly shakes Luke's hand after she signs her name in the volunteer list. Her fear that she's an old flame is dissuaded when Shara Bey explains she and Luke were in the same regiment. He leads her into a room and keeps his back turned so she can change. Out of curiosity, she calls out his name to see if he'll stare. He answers without turning. _A debonair farmboy. My very own knight._ He brings her into the music room so the class can start. A variety of girls, ranging from seven to sixteen step forward in pink, white and black tutus. The children's emotions are a mix of dread and euphoria. She's seen performers less nervous on opening night. Luke detaches his prosthetic and places it above the piano before addressing them.

"Ladies, this is my friend Mara. She's going to continue your class today because Miss Syndulla had an emergency. Be yourselves and don't be afraid to ask questions."

An adorable little girl with blonde hair stays behind the door, trying unsuccessfully to camouflage. She looks eight but her gaze belongs to an old woman, disillusioned with life and anxious to disappear. Judging by her clothes, she's not in the class. Well, that won't do. Dancing belongs to everyone, not whoever the teacher appoints.

"Hi honey, what's your name?"

"Tahiri"

"Well Tahiri, you're the cutest thing I've ever seen. I bet you could charm Dracula if you tried. Wanna be the cutest thing that ever danced?"

"You're funny, miss Mara?"

"What it is sweetie?"

"Can I have a tiara?"

"You most definitely can."

Tahiri's request makes all the other little girls want tiaras. Then the older ones feel left out so they also ask for them. They dance in synch, immersed in the melody Luke plays in the piano. For these girls dancing is an escape. From what exactly, Mara can't say. Some of these kids are untapped potential, she gives them all business cards for ballet companies and promises to put in a good word if they audition. They get the same glow in their eyes Luke did when she kissed him in the cheek. She tells Luke that next time they should bring fairy wings to match the tiaras. He beams with happiness at her as they drive to her apartment, commending her behavior.

"You were spectacular with them. A lot of people get grossed out by that kind of situation. When a total stranger does what you did, it really builds their self-confidence. Take it from someone who knows, it's liberating to be with somebody who's not afraid of you."

"Why would anybody be afraid of them or you?"

"Mara, If I wasn't a realist I'd think you're the long awaited Dea to my Gwynplaine."

"Who are these characters?"

"They're from a Victor Hugo novel, The Man Who Laughs."

"Send me a copy if you have any spare time."

"I'll buy you a copy."

"Save your money farmboy, I can download it from Kindle."

"Is this your apartment building? "

" Yeah, pull over cause I think I see Winter's telescope on the balcony."

"You're worrying over the wrong family member, Leia's the one who'll burn you on the stake, she's the mayor of Naboo and her husband's the sheriff so she could get away with it."

"Is that how you chase the girls away, your sister scares them to death?"

"More like she comforts me after I scare girls to death while Han resurrects them so he and Leia can shoot them afterwards."

"Luke, you're every woman's dream. There's nothing scary about you."

"Look at me."

"I am looking at you."

He opens her car door and ends the conversation. She invites him up and he politely refuses. He gently moves to take her hand, shaking like a leaf. Almost as if he didn't know if it was allowed. His self image is messed up beyond belief. Who says "feel free to say no" before asking someone out? She smiles at him while uttering yes and he blushes. His dimples are adorable. She kisses him on the lips before she enters the building. He stares in incredulity at her and nearly falls on the steps before recovering his balance. She fixes his sleeves before he leaves.  _I'm convincing you to wear less fabric even if it kills me._

"Goodnight farmboy"

"Goodnight Dea."


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Misunderstandings lead to fistfights and the past is discussed when Han Solo enters the picture.

Dating Luke is nothing short of magical. The man sees the world in a idealistic standpoint that puts most of their generation to shame. He says what he believes and stands by it. Even if no one else does. With Luke championing a lost cause doesn't seem bleak, it seems inevitable if nobility of spirit demands it. Personality wise, he would thrive in King Arthur's Court. For Luke the definition of love is unconditional loyalty, respect and affection. He defines friend as someone unrelated who will die for you. _And you call yourself_   _a realist. If anything farmboy, you're a modern day Jefferson Smith._  He treats her like a queen. On their fifth date he kisses her, so softly it resembles a prayer, an angel's whisper. She caresses his face and he weeps for joy. By mid-September Mara finally convinces Luke to stop wearing those coats. The turtle necks are a work in progress. All things considered, she hasn't been this happy since great-uncle Palpatine was alive. Which is Lando's comments in the gym right now are really grating her nerves.

"Did you and Winter switch bodies or something cause your behavior lately is OOC to the max."

"Calrissian, you're the one that's OCC. I set you up with beautiful women and you rejected them all."

"Are you hearing yourself??? You wanna dance with nerds and fatties? Fine but hook me up with someone hot damnit !!!"

"The last three dates I arranged for you weren't hot??"

"I'm not into giraffes, hippos or laughing hyenas. And neither were you last month. The woman I've known since college wouldn't let herself be courted by a one armed Justin McLeod !!!"

"Careful Lando, I hit a lot harder than little Miss Celchu."

That has the desired effect of shutting him up. His co-workers think his black eye came from a bar fight, not a five foot, 110 pound pacifist and he wants to keep it that way. Stupid male bravado. He mumbles that if the rest of Winter's family is like Luke, the girls should use birth control. _Calrissian, this is exactly why I let you think I'm not a virgin._ Her Emperor taught her the value of purity. How it is irreplaceable and can only be given to the right individual. And how this individual had to love her as much as he did. She's lost quite a few love interests by refusing to sleep with them. Is it too much to ask for men that they propose or introduce her to their parents before trying to take her clothes off? So far Luke hasn't made any advances. He seems content without sex. Every time they kiss, he's still in awe. Maybe they do teach something worthwhile in Naboo. Her cellphone rings, she hears Luke telling her he has to cancel their dinner reservation tonight. Which would be fine with her if she didn't hear another man's voice in the back asking if there's any alcohol in his apartment.

She gets Luke's address from Winter and takes a taxi. Okay, maybe it's nothing. It could just be the TV in his apartment. She could be exaggerating. Luke wouldn't cheat on her with a man, right? The happy bubble she's been in all month is dangerously close to breaking. She knocks on the door and is met with a six foot, brown eyed, scruffy looking man who could be voted sexiest man alive in an instant. At least Luke cheated on her with someone a lot hotter than miss Phasma. Said man asks if she's the pizza delivery girl. She answers no and he slams the door. She kicks it open and the scruffy man warns her not to step any further unless she wants a knuckle sandwich. He looks tired, but no less determined. And clearly he has no qualms about beating up a girl.  _This'll be fun._

The scruffy man tries to hit her, she blocks his punches every time. He's stronger than her but not faster. His technique tells her he's military, his rapid pace indicates he's been itching for a fight. Something's frustrating him. Whatever it is makes him sloppy. He lands a punch in the stomach, she slams his head on the table. He calls her a psycho bitch, she calls him a worthless scoundrel.

"Han, what's going on over there??  _Wait, Han? As in brother in law Han? Oh shit._

"Luke, we're being invaded by a redheaded ninja in a sundress!!!!"

"Mara, I'm sorry for canceling but I can't walk."

"That's Mara?!? I thought you said she was sweet, not lethal !!!"

She doesn't hear Han's insult, her mind shut off everything that isn't Luke's voice after his apology. He sounded like he was in pain. It reminds her of great-uncle Sheev's agonizing speech before he went to heaven. She follows the echo and dreads the possibilities. Please don't die, please don't die farmboy. She finds him in what she assumes to be his bedroom. It's full of photographs depicting family and friends, overflowing with old books. A Legion Of Merit insignia is hung on the wall next to a purple heart. He's lying awkwardly in a full-size bed, a Shetland Sheepdog is nuzzling his stump and whimpering as if his master's pain was his own. There's an empty bottle of whisky on the chair.

"Artoo, stop whining: you're embarrassing me in front of the lady. "

" The lady embarrassed herself by nearly killing your brother in law. "

" Good, his ego could use a little deflating. "

" So what happened?? "

" I ran out of medication for my chronic pain. So I risked a Tylenol overdose and waited all day for my prescription and drove to the pharmacy which was closed by the time I got it. So no meds today. Han panicked when I didn't call him and drove all the way from Montana to see if I was alright. Then he got me drunk to lessen the pain. "

" He drove all this way nonstop to see you??"

"That's an inch compared to the time he carried me thirty miles across enemy territory.* Han's the only reason I survived that blast. He puts on this tough guy act but underneath he's a marshmallow."

"Sounds like a good friend."

"The best. Could you please check if he's alright? You pack a mean punch Dea."

"I still haven't read that book farmboy."

"Please check on him ."

Typical Luke behavior, trying to heal the world without tending to his wounds. She kisses his hand and tells Artoo to take good care of his master. The dog barks and jumps to the empty space in Luke's bed. When she leaves the room Han is leaning his ear to the wall. And holding a bag of frozen peas to his head. In light of the circumstances, it's kinda cute to see him so protective. Luke is lucky to have him. He heard the whole conversation, obviously. She receives her first official death threat, which she takes as a sign that her relationship is serious. He doesn't accept her apology, what he wants is for Luke not to get his heart broken.

" I mean it Red, you cause one tear and I'm burying you in the backyard. Last thing the kid needs is Callista 2.0."

"His high school girlfriend Callista?? Luke said they went their separate ways, not that she dumped him."

"Luke is incapable of bad-mouthing anyone !!! Bet he didn't tell you they were engaged, am I right??"

"No, he didn't."

"Luke somehow managed to get a fiancée without losing his cherry. Damn kid was born a couple of centuries too late if you ask me."

"I think this century needs more people of his caliber."

"You and me both, Red."

"Back to Callista."

"Kid stays faithful to her all through the war and sends letters that make the females in our regiment swoon. We get bombed, I carry him to safety and hitch a ride to make sure he lives. His sister and I bonded while he was in a coma. We visited him every day. Callista went once and she threw up at the sight of him. Thank God he hadn't woken up yet. When he did, she broke their engagement right there in the hospital and the kid cried himself to sleep that night. Three years of war and Luke was still innocent until that day. I'll never forgive the bitch for that."

"And you let her get away with it?!?"

"No, I stole the hospital tapes and showed the whole town how she dumped him. Turned her into a social pariah. Leia broke into her bank account, stole the witch's life savings and donated them to the Girl Scouts. No evidence was found. Of course back then, we were amateurs. These days we're a lot meaner."

"I believe you 100℅ and I will not let go of my Prince Charming."

"I wanna trust you Red. I want the kid to be happy."

"He's in good hands. Go home Han, you got a wife and two kids who miss you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Han and Luke's past can be found in "Origins Stories and deleted scenes from Ripping Off The Veil", my second part of this verse.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which barriers are knocked down without realizing it and Mara meets the Skywalker family.

Almost a month after Han's visit Luke shows up to a date wearing a dress shirt with a spread collar. So long turtle necks, you shan't be missed. He looks at her that moment and guides her hands over certain areas of his neck, shoulders and back. His skin is smooth, unblemished by the scars of battle. There's no lust in his gaze, only resolution to accept the consequences of this moment tinged with fright. It's some sort of test but it's purpose is lost to her. What do you gain from this, what are you showing me that I can't see? He falters a bit as her hands touch his chest. His eyes dare her to keep looking as he unbuttons the shirt. The man has no right to hide those abs from the free world. He sighs in relief, looking to bystanders like a prisoner who's just been released from death row.

"Congratulations, you passed."

"Farmboy, I don't even know what test I was taking."

"If you don't mind my chest, you can see my father. The man insisted on proof that you wouldn't barf when you see him. He's kinda paranoid. The twin's birthday party is next week. Mom wants to meet you there."

"Will Terminator Leia be there as well??"

"Sadly, no. She and Han were called to deal with some political issues that went over my head. They had their own cake with the twins to make up for it. But the rest of my enormous family will be there. "

"Anything I should know before meeting your family??"

"My aunts will try to feed you a bakery if you let them, my niece Jaina is a little shy and Artoo's coming along. "

" You're not sitting me next to the dog are you???"

"No, that's Winter's spot ever since he was a puppy."

"You gonna tell me why your father's afraid of me puking on sight?"

"Next to him, I look like Brad Pitt."

She decides fair is fair and presents Luke and Winter to her cousin Korkie. They get along smashingly. Korkie tells her to marry the man as quickly as possible. And then he gives her a loaded gun in case he's wrong. He's a Kryze, no doubt about it. Winter begs her not to introduce Korkie to Luke's adopted brother Galen or his wife Juno. She makes no promises. They make the necessary arrangements and leave on friday for Jacen and Jaina's birthday party. Luke apologizes in advance for the countless death threats she'll receive from his friends and family as they drive to Naboo. There's not a pavement for miles around.

"Welcome to Naboo: population of 435 humans and 800 cows."

"Did we go back in time? This sort of place doesn't exist in the 21st century."

"We've had contractors try to put cement over the years but Dad scares them all off. Do not anger my father unless you're suicidal."

_So that's where Leia gets her temper from. I wonder what Luke and Leia's mother is like._ She'll find out soon enough. Her own mother is a mystery she'll never solve. Her earliest memory of the woman who birthed her consists of clumsily walking towards her and falling before she can catch up. Great-uncle Palpatine is the one who picks her up from the ground and kisses her forehead, then he kissed her on the lips. It sums up their fledgeling relationship perfectly. Seeing Luke and Winter talk so fondly about their mothers makes her jealous for a moment. They stop at a house that looks like it came out of a country poster. Artoo jumps out of the car window to pounce on a little boy playing outside with Han's hair and eyes. 

"Uncle Luke, help me!!!"

"I'll be there in a moment Jacen, you can last that long."

"If I die, Mommy will kill you."

"If you die, you don't get any presents."

At the prospect of no presents, Luke's nephew stands up and commands Artoo to sit down. Boys will be boys. Luke calls her "Lady Mara of New York" when he introduces her to Jacen. The boy laughs and says her hair is prettier than his sister's. Ah, the bluntness of youth. He runs to the house screaming "they're here!!!" with lungs so strong he might have a career in Theatre. A beautiful woman with greying brown braids and friendly eyes comes to greet them. Hollywood missed a Oscar winner with this one. The color is different but Luke's gaze is identical to the woman's. It's no surprise to her when he says she's his mother Padmé. The same light that shines in Luke is present in her. She asks him to get his father and bring Mara to the aunts. He heads upstairs, kisses her cheek and leaves her with a swarm of middle aged women who gush over the fact that Luke brought a girl. Their names are similar for the most part: Sabé, Dormé, Eirtaé, Rabé who is Winter's mother, Teckla, Moteé and Breha. What was Luke's grandmother thinking when she named her daughters?

They offer her every pastry God ever made. And remind her of the other fine uses of knives should their beloved nephew be harmed. Luke wasn't kidding, these women are amazons. She mouths "help me" to Winter but she just grins and goes off to play with the children. She wonders if this is payback for confiscating her Andrea Bocelli CD. Luke's uncle Owen saves her from saying no and potentially hurting their feelings. Unlike Padmé, Luke's father Anakin only has an older brother. So no more aunts at least. Except for Owen's wife Beru, but she's practically a saint. They put her to work fixing the fence. It feels good to be useful. Once they've finished Beru leads her back to the house and gives her lemonade in the kitchen. A blonde, middle aged man is sitting at the kitchen table, he's gazing at Padmé the way every woman wants to be looked at. When she sees Mara, Luke's mother taps him on the shoulder and the man fixes a hearing aid she hadn't noticed. The man has no legs and his left arm is stiff. He moves his wheelchair and Luke's eyes are staring back at her. So this is Luke's father.

"Luke wasn't lying, many an artist would paint your portrait Miss Jade."

"Oh, so you're the one who taught him all those old-fashioned compliments."

"My son loves unconditionally, regardless of whether or not we deserve it. He's fallen in love with you. Abuse that love and I will end your miserable life, am I clear!!!"

"One question: how are all of you going to kill me? Cause I think there'll be a line at this point."

"You have a dark sense of humor, you're dangerous, unusual and I can tell you have issues buried under that mask deep down. You'll fit right in with us."

She chooses to take his words as a positive response. A little girl comes forward and asks who she is. Mara blushes when Jaina calls her uncle Luke's girlfriend. His niece pushes her grandfather's wheelchair out of the kitchen, claiming that he needs playtime. Luke comes in and tells his niece to be careful with her grandpa who replies that if the Gulf War didn't kill him, playing with children won't finish him off. Galen gets criticized by everybody but Anakin for buying the twins toy guns. The rest of the day is uneventful. Except when the twins catch them just before they leave and start singing the kissing song. The Skywalkers are reckless, overprotective, unapologetic misfits and Mara loves them for it.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which ugly truths are discovered unintetionally and Rogue Squadron makes an appearance.

In the middle of October she invites Luke into her apartment, this time he accepts the offer. The cold temperatures have forced him back to heavy layers but he promised it was only till the weather changed and she believes him. He takes off his coat upon entering. She starts making tea and watches him examine the bookshelves. He picks up a old but still in pristine condition ballerina doll from the shelf and looks at her inquisitively. 

"That's Clara, great-uncle Palpatine gave her to me as a child."

"I think it's creepy that this doll looks exactly like you."

"She was custom made to look like me, it's not her fault."

"How old were you when he gave you this doll?"  


"I was seven, great-uncle died when I was nine."

"Then how come you talk about him more than your parents? You said they died while you were in college."

"My inattentive parents were rabble, Great-uncle was an Emperor. I was his to have as he saw fit and he was mine alone."

His eyes widen at her statement. As if he sees something terribly wrong with it. Luke asks her if there was ever anything great-uncle did that she wasn't supposed to tell. When she says the tea parties are secret, he requests details of their special game. For the first time in their relationship she denies him. To impart such knowledge would violate the rules the Emperor left for her to follow. He finds a loophole and inquires if she was restricted from showing anyone through gestures how the game worked, without speaking. She answers no and proceeds to touch him. It's much easier than when she was little, her lips can reach the neck now. She takes Luke's hand and places it under her dress, for some reason he looks sick. After that day, he never lets her compare him to Sheev Palpatine again. 

She eavesdrops on Luke talking to Han on the phone over possible paedophilia victims in the 90s, particularly girls related to politicians. Poor helpless children, she pities them. Thank goodness the Emperor always protected her from those wolves in sheep's clothing. He accumulates files and closes them before she can see them, he asks her to trust him. She does, he's never given her reasons for doubting his integrity. Luke accidentally leaves the files on her table one day. Lando skims them out of curiosity before she can stop him, he holds back the urge to vomit. Now she definitely doesn't want to see whatever's in there. Lando tries to rip the papers and tells her to dump the demented psychopath before she ends up in the morgue, she locks the papers in her room and doesn't dignify his claim with a response. Mara gives Luke the documents back, he burns them in the fireplace and hugs her like nothing else matters in that moment. Things go back to normal.

Luke gives her a house key in late October. They start havings movie nights in his couch. The man has an huge collection of silent fims and musicals on VHS. Luke starts shaking in a war movie and Artoo barks loudly, Mara turns it off and snuggles him. He apologizes profusely for the incident, she tells him the film wasn't a timeless classic if it's not approved by Artoo. After all this time, he still marvels at every kiss they share. A few weeks later Luke leaves for North Dakota to help a friend. The next day she finds several men sharing coffee with Luke in his apartment. They all look tired and unshaven. 

"Mara, this is Biggs Darklighter, Wedge Antilles, Kes Dameron, Chewbacca, Wes Janson and Jek Porkins. Proud members of Rogue Squadron. My fellow Rogues: this is Mara Jade."

"Is there a military ceremony today or they did come here to inspect me, farmboy."

"Actually, they're here because Galen and I busted them out of jail. Don't tell anyone about them."

"You and your brother did what !?!?"

"Biggs is 1/16 Sioux on his mother's side so I knew he would join the Standing Rock protests. Turns out his whole family got arrested. I went with Galen to see if we could help since he lives closer to New York than Han. Found out the old gang was locked up and we just... acted?"

"Luke, you should have taken me with you."

"You're not angry at me for breaking the law?"

"Farmboy, this just reaffirms my belief that Callista Ming deserves the biggest loser crown and scepter for dumping you. "

Her statement makes Rogue Squadron whoop and Wedge says she's a keeper. Chewbacca asks Wes for money in Russian, apparently the two of them bet on whether or not Mara was real. She quips back in Russian that gambling leads to addiction and everyone stares in shock. Porkins asks where she learnt Russian, which leads to Dameron begging for any of her Bolshoi acquaintance's phone number. Luke informs Kes that Shara Bey broke up with her boyfriend and she's offered to house them. Kes inmediately retracts his desire for foreign ballerinas. Men are so predictable. Shara arrives at 10 and turns red as a tomato when Dameron flirts with her. Biggs stays behind and sleeps over. Unlike the others, he's known Luke since childhood and feels it's his right to tell Mara embarrassing stories about his oldest friend, despite the latter's disapproval. She laughs till her lungs feel like they're going to burst. Darklighter doesn't give any death threats cause he thinks that Padmé Skywalker nee Amidala's wrath is punishment enough. He's probably correct in assuming that good people are better at revenge. Biggs leaves in the morning and calls dibs on being godfather to their firstborn. 

"So what'd you think of the Rogues? "

" Put em all on skinny jeans and your protests will have poster boys"

"Kes and Chewbacca would rather be flayed. Biggs and Wedge maybe but Porkins on skinny jeans? You'll give people nightmares."

"You want a nightmare? That lawyer obsessed with your mom is grotesque. He'd be perfect for a cheesy horror movie."

"Most women call Rush Clovis stunning, not horrific."

"Those warts and his pale, sickly skin will stun anyone with good eyesight. Your dad's way hotter than him, even without his legs."

"Mara, please marry me. "

" What kind of proposal is that? No ring, no kneeling down and you're in pajamas."

"My dad proposed to mom in kindergarten with a runny nose and a broken wrist. She said yes in a heartbeat."

"Well I need the ring. Bring one and I'll consider it, even if you get it from a cereal box."

"But there's a chance you'd say yes in the future?"

"In the 22nd century, your face will be the new definition of self-loathing."

He shakes his head playfully at her and wishes her a wonderful day. She gives him a goodbye kiss and they both say farewell, blissfully unaware that the calm before the storm is nearing its end.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which secrets are unfolded and things fall apart when the charm is broken.

Mara goes with Luke to the annual Halloween party on Naboo and finally meets Leia Skywalker-Solo. Luke's sister is short, beautiful and around three months pregnant. Which earns the aforementioned lady a "when were you going to tell me?" from her twin brother. She's using her pregnancy as part of her reelection campaign. Han keeps insisting that they should name the baby Han Solo Junior, Leia wants to name their son Anakin for her father. Outwardly, nothing about this graceful, brunette, porcelain skin goddess screams  ** _danger._** Until Rush Clovis tries to dissuade Padmé from "wasting her life as the bride of Frankenstein". Has he looked in a mirror lately? Then Leia beats Mara to punching the shit out of the man and reenters the festivities with a face so calm, you'd never guess she left a man unconscious and tied him naked to the nearest tree.  _Note to self: do not anger this politician. Leia's Princess Xena in high heels and fancy braids._

Mara tells Luke where her will is kept, in case his sister burns/drowns/strangles her to death. He can have all her Opera records, even her rare Rosa Poncelli vinyl. Kyle can have her library. Lando can have grandpa's disco collection. God knows he and Korkie are the only ones who'd appreciate it. Luke just laughs and says that he'll protect her. If Luke doesn't keep his word, she is going to haunt him till he greys prematurely. They see Biggs volunteering at Rochester under a fake name a couple of days later. Does no one from Naboo possess an ounce of self-preservation? After hearing about Leia's pregnancy, he jokingly orders them to start working on their babymaking. Her Emperor would had a heart attack if he'd met Luke and Biggs in the same room.

"Does Biggs know you were a virgin until we made love 3 weeks ago cause I thought he'd have given you a girl for the night."

"Not so loud, spies are everywhere. And he did about two years ago. But I convinced her to teach me a few tricks instead of ravaging me. Then we pretended to have sex so the guys wouldn't get another one."

"What, she wasn't pretty enough for you?"

"No, she was a supermodel but I don't believe in pity sex or one night stands for that matter. I wanted someone who saw me, not a gnarled amputee."

"So you wanted a blind girl. Visually impaired people still see, not just not the way we do."

"I know, my church has a blind priest and **nothing** escapes Father Kota. But that might be due to his Black Ops training."

"Farmboy, sometimes I think you're a magnet for noteworthy veterans and handicapped people. "

" Monsters have a way of finding each other. "

"Halloween was last week, I'll see you tomorrow and hopefully you'll have an epiphany and realize how beautiful you are by then."

She hails a taxi and heads home for a good night's sleep. For a second, she wonders if Winter has Callista Ming's home address so she can kill her for giving someone as wonderful as Luke insecurities. Nah, the bitch's not worth the homicide charges. Besides, Luke wouldn't approve it. He's never been prone to revenge. With a father like Anakin, that's a miracle. Probably his grandmother Shmi's influence. That old lady's a regular Mother Theresa. Her phone starts ringing, it better be important.

" Lando: I'm tired so clubbing is not in my plans tonight. Find another wingman or in my case wingwoman."

"Shallow Jade, looks can fade."

"What are you rambling on about???"

"I freed you from that Qui-Gon Jinn's voodoo spell and prevented your funeral. Your welcome."

"Are you stoned or something? I'm in perfect health and Qui-Gon Jinn's a life coach, not a witchdoctor."

"Meet me at Winter's place. I'll explain everything."

Great, now I have to take Calrissian for a psych evaluation. Unless he's high, then I'm putting him to bed with a teddy bear and posting the pictures on Facebook. She hangs up the phone and tells the driver to change course. Instead of the handsome figure that drove the car, she sees a mousy man with a receding hairline. What the hell is going on? Did the other taxi driver drug me? She jumps out of the vehicle and walks the rest of the way to Winter's apartment. Her best friend is hitting Lando with a rolling pin and saying that he ruined everything. He starts talking about some sort of trance Jinn gave her to see inner beauty. Winter believes him and says it explains how Mara constantly said Luke was gorgeous, her cousin hasn't been handsome since that blast disfigured him. Mara doesn't believe them until she sees Porkins who's chatting online with Winter and the 300 pound man cracks a joke about Bolshoi ballerinas she never told Lando when he sees her. She grabs the rolling pin from Winter and hits him on the head.

"Thanks a lot, you narcissistic, discomaniac manwhore !!!! I had a hot, gentlemanly man who was head over heels for me and you made him disappear!!!

"Your Prince charming is a crippled paedophile !!! I was trying to protect you."

"What the fuck made you think that ?!?!"

"I have evidence, look this fell off the files he had. I took it before you noticed. The girl here is four, five years old tops."

"Lando, this girl is me."

She recognizes that dress. Great-uncle had bought it for her and gave her warm milk that made her sleepy. She's asleep in this photo and the dress is cast aside in the corner, covered in semen. Oh my God, those women weren't lying !!! It's all gone horribly wrong. The Emperor is a servant of evil, Luke is deformed and she's a shallow whore that defended a rapist. Her whole life is meaningless. She has no honor, no legacy, no place in her head untouched by his poison. There's nowhere to hide, the corpse is still smiling. Her body faints while she screams inside.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Luke and Mara discuss what's happened and I shamelessly resume "The Man Who Laughs". Why? Because I'm tired of nobody else knowing anything about that masterpiece.

When Mara regains her senses, she sees Artoo bark in delight. The faithful dog stays by her side as Han walks into the room. Thank God someone still looks the same as they did during the charm. He asks if she remembers anything from the past few days. All Mara recalls is guilt, hopelessness and being tired of living yet afraid of hell's descent but she can't tell him that. She lies and says that nothing comes to mind. The scruffy looking man tells Mara she tried to gauge her eyes out and they had to tie her to the bed to stop those attempts. They should have let her be blind, then maybe she could see Luke in a better way. She's terrified of what will happen when they meet again. What if she doesn't recognize him??? As if summoning her fears, Han calls for Luke and she covers herself with the blankets, leaving only the hand that's petting Artoo exposed. She hears Luke's footsteps as he enters cautiously. The dog runs from her bedside to greet his master. He holds her hand, if not for the gentleness of his touch she'd claim it's a stranger drawing circles in her palm. Luke's hand isn't smooth anymore, it's rough and mangled in some places.

"How are you feeling?"  _I'd be contemplating suicide to spare Korkie the shame of having a whore and a rapist for family if I hadn't read Dante's Inferno. Why didn't anyone notice before Luke??_

"How did you notice what no one else did in decades??"

"Mara, no childhood game involves touching a little girl's private parts. I was going to tell you but I thought it best to break it to you slowly."

"Farmboy, there's no good way to tell someone she's a harlot who put a child molester on a pedestal."

"Don't do that to yourself. It wasn't your fault and it never will be."

"Spare me your lies Quasimodo !!! Just admit you lost your virginity to a shallow tramp !!!"

"No shallow tramp would ever look at me the way you do..." _Oh God, please tell me the barely audible crying noises are from the TV._

"Farmboy?? I'm sorry for insulting you."

"You're hurt and irate and scared. To be angry is to be human."

"Luke..... Could you do something for me?"

"Of course. What do you need?"

"Read me The Man Who Laughs."

"I will if you take off the blankets."

"I don't wanna see anybody right now. I'm avoiding reality."

"Then how about you take off the blankets with your eyes closed?"

She follows his suggestion and shudders at the gust of cold air that hits her. Luke reads her the novel and Mara regrets asking this of him. She had pictured Gwynplaine and Dea as star-crossed lovers, maybe a peasant girl hopelessly in love with a prince or a couple torn apart by the drums of war. Instead Gwynplaine is a boy stolen from his family and disfigured by comprachichos, a perverse group of men who surgically deform children to sell them as circus Freaks. These people mutilate Gwynplaine's mouth into a macabre grin, forcing him to wear a grotesque smile perpetually. _Oh Luke is this how you see yourself???_ His torturers abandon him in a snowstorm barefoot. The little boy puts most of humanity to shame by feeling compassion for a man's frozen corpse in spite of his own suffering. Next to the corpse, a dead mother and her shivering baby lie in the snow. Gwynplaine shelters the baby girl from the cold. A man called Ursus takes pity on Gwynplaine and houses him and the babe. In contrast to Gwynplaine's sorry condition, the baby's face is angelic. Her sole flaw is blindness. That baby is Dea. Ursus raises them together, the three make their living in fairs across the country where Gwynplaine is ridiculed on stages. He still puts them to shame by remaining just, loving and gentle. Dea is his confidant, his friend but he is far too ashamed of his appearance to believe they can be lovers. When he finally lets Dea see his deformity with her hands she proclaims her love stating "God closed my eyes so I could only see the real Gwynplaine."  _God didn't close my eyes, Qui-Gon Jinn did._

"You stopped reading farmboy."

"We reached the happy ending."

"That book's a lot thicker than what you read."

"Be thankful I brought my copy Miss I'll download it on Kindle."

"What do you want from me? I can't be Dea. I'm not virtuous, wise or pure. You don't know how deep his claws sunk into my brain.'

"Mara I love you and by some miracle you love me.That's all I need to know."

"Give me time. I have to figure things out: who I am without his influence, what I really think instead what I think he'd approve of."

"How much time? A month, a year? I can't wait longer than a decade. After that I'll join the priesthood."

"What if I never come back??"

"Then thank you for the fairytale. Keep the book, I've practically memorized it."  _Luke, whatever you are on the outside is nothing compared to what I must look like within. You were Adonis, I'm probably a decrepit hag with black teeth and yellow drool._

Luke gives her hand a tiny squeeze. It's goodbye, don't leave me and I'll always love you wrapped into one seemingly insignificant gesture. She hears Han mumbling that he wants a time machine to kill Palpatine before Mara's born. The door closes and Artoo's tail can't be heard thumping on the floor. She opens her eyes and Luke is gone. _What did we do to deserve this?_


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kyle Katarn is the voice of reason for these troubling times and we go down deeper down the rabbit hole.

T.F Hodge's saying about how once you taste the best, no other taste will do is highly accurate. Mara's had a taste of Luke Skywalker, life without him is misery prolonged. She can't escape the bulk of his presence in her life. He's everywhere: the scent of each bakery she walks by, the sound of her music records, the hum of the train, the last rays of sunset. She burns every photo of Sheev Palpatine she has, except the ones with her grandmother. Those just get his face cut off from them. There's a possibility grandma Satine was killed by him, the last time they talked she had wanted to take over babysitting her granddaughter and kept asking mother questions. Grandma had a meeting with a private investigator that day, she never went because of her massive heart attack. Her half-brother was the last person to see her alive. At this point Mara wouldn't put it past him. The Emperor had always looked longingly at both his half-sisters but each gaze was different. She analyzes every video of them available for answers. How he looked at great aunt Mira said **I want to kill you.** ( Perhaps her car accident was arranged). Grandma's said **_you should have been mine._**  Maybe that's why he chose her for his depravities and barely acknowledged cousin Korkie. She was grandma's carbon copy except for her red hair but great grandpa had always been wary of his stepson. If her parents had been half as attentive, this whole mess could have been avoided. The thought that it wasn't even her he wanted makes it worse because that would mean no one's ever chosen Mara except Luke and Palpatine ruined that beyond the grave. She gives the city permission to remove the Empe.... the _**monster's**_ statue. Korkie doesn't understand why and she can't tell him. His career in UNICEF will go up in flames if the truth is revealed. Once it's done, she shuts herself up in her apartment. Her only contact with anything living is the dodecatheon and forget-me nots Luke planted on her balcony. She's afraid to look up the flower language on those plants, Luke told her Aunt Beru taught him flower symbology as a kid so the botanist could finally "talk shop" with somebody besides her husband. That man has an elephant's memory. With Luke every action is meaningful so the flowers probably have some poetic connotation that will make her cry if she googles it. Lando and Winter had left a month ago to search for Qui-Gon Jinn  & restore the charm so there's no one who'll bother her apart from phone calls and lying comes naturally to her. Or so she thinks until Kyle breaks open the door.

"Jesus!!! Who are you and what have done with my friend ??"

"Leave me alone Kyle. Can't you see I'm depressed?"

"Life's too short to waste on depression. Get out of that silk nightgown, take a shower and put on some jeans."

"What if I say no??"

"In normal situations we're equally matched but right now I can overpower you."

That prompts the reaction Kyle wanted from her. She's already lost her value, she won't lose her dignity as well. Kyle whips up a meal while she bathes. He sends her back to change when he sees her wearing too many layers. Judging from the look on his face he's worried that there was no sassy comeback. If she weren't so depressed, she'd laugh at how she's switched roles with Luke. Her breasts hurt so much she nearly ditches the bra & her skinny jeans don't fit. The scale says she's gone from 105 to 109 pounds. Great, she's lost her pride, her future and now her lightning fast metabolism is fading away. Finally Kyle asks for an explanation. She tells him every sordid detail from the elevator to the photo.

"In my humble opinion, you should just see him again. Don't wait for the hypnosis. You got all this emotional thing don't cha? And he doesn't care about your past. What's stopping you?

"What if I see Luke and panic when I don't recognize him? He won't understand why I freak out. As far as he knows, I saw the full extent of his scars and still found him beautiful. I need the charm Kyle, otherwise I risk crushing the man I love irreparably."

"Wise folks always say love is blind. Your obsession with beauty isn't really yours, it's old wrinklyface's. If you depend on magic instead of trusting yourself, Palpatine wins."

Her stomach lurches violently before she can answer. She vomits in the kitchen sink. Kyle thinks it might be cause her body had adjusted to surviving on tea and crackers so a solid meal was too much at the moment. He leaves after making oatmeal the next day and doesn't see her throw up again. Despite the sickness, she admits Kyle is right. Palpatine took her childhood, she can't let him take anything else. She goes to Luke's apartment and finds Leia who just walked Artoo and tells her to stay away from her brother or risk amputation. Aren't pregnant women supposed to be soft and lovable?? Winter tells her that Leia's staying the week for a conference. Mara rearranges her plans for the week, Hell is cold compared to a woman's wrath.When she pukes at the pharmacy bathroom, the owner Maz Kanata offers her a discount on prenatal vitamins and ginger tea. Suddenly she realizes that she hasn't had her period in two months. She buys ten pregnancy tests from different brands and drinks her weight in water. One by one, they all show two little pink lines and/or plus signs.  _No fair, L_ _ando has sex with half the state for years and no babies but I make love to a man once and get knocked up._ She tells Lando and Winter to stop looking, avoiding Luke now is immoral. He has a right to know about the baby. Mara goes to Rochester in hopes of finding him at the hospital. Shara leads her to his work area but informs her that sadly Luke left a few hours ago.

"Miss Jade !!! I'm so happy to see you!!! "

The greeting comes from a little girl with severe burns all over her face. It's old damage, the girl's probably here for a checkup but Mara's never met her. Though her voice sounds oddly familiar. For the sake of propriety she pretends to know the girl but not her name. The girl presents herself as **Tahiri** and says the nurses really appreciated her contribution to the hospital's Camp for  burnt children. Luke's conversation in their first date makes a lot more sense now. She hugs Tahiri and tries to hold her fears at bay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In Flower Language  
> Forget-me-not: my one true love  
> Dodecatheon: you are my divinity.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We flashback to the night "it" happened.

The week before Halloween Luke declines her invitation to the ballet's Halloween ball. She can't understand why, it's four days before the Naboo celebration and Winter confirmed he's free. He keeps making excuses, something he's never done in the three months they've been dating. For every alibi, she prepares a counterargument. At the end he confesses to never attending parties outside his hometown since he was deployed. Especially the fancy type with coat and tie requirements. Luke claims he has no desire to be mocked by snobby well to-do people. As a multi-billionaire she takes offense to that.

"Having a large inheritance doesn't make someone a self-absorbed imbecile. And it's not just for the donators, the whole staff will be there. You could meet Deppa Billalba, you have all her CDs. Come on Luke, it'll be fun. "

" Sure, being gawked at is **loads** of fun. Unless I wear a costume that covers my whole face. Then I'll be fine as long as I don't eat or drink anything. "

" Farmboy, you showed me your country wonderland, why can't I show you my native environment? "

" Wait: are you telling me you're strong, graceful, beautiful **and** wealthy?"

"Your aunts noticed I'm rich when they saw my shoes. Then again straight men don't know designer brands so it was stupid to think you'd notice that. It changes nothing except where we send our kids to school."

"Pablo, your Marianela dreads the day thine sight is restored."

"Where do you get these books farmboy? You know, most men just compare their girlfriends to Juliet. "

" I didn't pray for Juliet. I prayed for you, my darling Dea."

"Flattery won't help this time. Tell you what: If you attend, I will grant you one wish. Anything you want, I'll get it for you. Deal?"

"Write a check for Rochester's Hospital Camp. If Trump wins the election, the kids will need insurance."

"No yachts, beach houses or sports cars?"

" What I do want those things for? "

The earnestness in his comment makes her love him even more. He nervously admits he doesn't have a costume. She takes him shopping and adds aversion to random mirrors on the list of inexplicable things about Luke. A kid in the store asks who did Luke's makeup cause his lack of fingernails is _awesome_ and he reflexively puts his hand into his coat pocket. What are they feeding this kid ? The tween gets chastised by his mother who rapidly apologizes on behalf of her son. Luke buys a full white mask and gloves. He goes as Lon Chaney's Phantom Of The Opera, when she asks if she should dress as Christine he politely refuses. Says that if she becomes Christine, Raoul will leave her twitterpated. Christine Daee wishes she was her. She dresses up as Mary Tudor instead. Artoo comes along with his service uniform in case there's any fireworks. For someone who protested coming every step of the way, he takes very well to the party. Mon Mothma's daughter rejoices when Luke answers her in perfect french and she doesn't need her mother to translate. As a result every kid there gets entertained by Luke, who handles the rascals like a pro but doesn't let them take off the mask. Bail Organa, the manager of the Metropolitan Opera House compliments him. He blends in so well that some sponsors think he's new money. It's amazing what good manners and fancy clothes do to people's perception. Her ex boyfriend Hux shows up with Miss Phasma. Luke beats her to decking him.  _Farmboy, please marry me._ They leave in high spirits, giggling like sweethearts in black and white movies.

"So Luke, when were you going to tell me you speak French?"

"When were you going to tell me you speak Russian?'

"Fair enough, recite something in French please. Something you identify yourself with that's not Victor Hugo."

"Apprends que me suis fait entièrement avec de la mort. De la tête aux pieds. Et que c'est un cadavre qui t'aime, que t'adore et qui ne te quittera plus jamais."*

"What does that mean?"

"I know you're way out of my league but I love you so much it doesn't matter to me. "

" Sounded a lot more denigrating to my ears. "

" Relax Mara, you seem to think I have some sort of inferiority complex. You're worse than Leia and that's saying something. "

"For once I agree with Leia. You do more with one hand than most people would with ten."

" Want to head upstairs for a drink? Chewie sends everyone Vodka for Christmas and if he finds out I didn't finish last year's bottle he'll never send it again."

"Well we certainly can't have that. Lead the way Ivanhoe."

He hangs the mink on his coat rack and expertly removes the hairpins from her braids. Oh, the benefits of growing up surrounded by elegant women. Grandma Satine was teaching her to braid when she died. They only mastered the fishtail braid and the Victorian bun Luke is unraveling. When he's finished, they serve the promised Vodka. Straight from Russia, no wonder he wants more. Great-uncle always warned her against drinking alone with a man. But this is Luke, she's safe with him. When half the bottle's empty, for the first time she actually wants to have sex. Great-uncle Sheev had spun stories of girls kidnapped and forced into prostitution with details so sharp that for years the faintest idea of fornications was horrifying to her. Being homeschooled until college per Palpatine's will didn't assuage that sentiment. It isolated her from the average teenager and young adults. Professor Shira Brie thought high school parties were synonimous with excommunication. She still doesn't know what a condom's for. But the word sounds ugly so it's probably used for disgusting stuff. Plus Lando insists on them and the man is a good friend but he has terrible taste which reaffirms that line of thought. She has no clue how to seduce men so she just blurts it out and Luke turns red with embarrassment. It's off the charts adorable.

Ugh, again with the excuses. Luke prattles on saying things like I'm a virgin, I don't need sex to know you love me, I don't have any condoms (why is that important?), blah blah blah. She gets fed up with the chitchat and kisses him long and hard, then she puts her head to his chest like Anna Karenina. His breath hitches and it's intoxicating. Then she guides his hand to her corset and unlaces it in front of him. He doesn't move and she starts berating herself for being so stupidly promiscuous. Oh God, he doesn't want her anymore. Why would he after that display? _Don't cry,_ it's _your own fault for whoring yourself in front of him. Great-uncle would electrify you for this._ Luke stands up and lovingly dries the tear from her face. Then she embraces him just for reassurance that he still cares. In that moment there is no falsehood, no lust, no expectation. Just a man and a woman the world never understood. They give themselves to each other. Luke doesn't touch Mara, he worships her. Every caress is profound, almost religious in nature. He thrusts and her heart goes faster and slower simultaneously. When she gets home, she's finding out what the whitish gray substance he filled her with is called. Her gut tells her not to ask about it now and it's never steered her wrong. The second time he lasts longer than the first. When Mara says she finally understands why people like sex, Luke tells her they didn't have sex, they made love. She stays the night and wakes to him by her side.

"Good morning. Did you sleep well?"

"Luke... Did you stay awake all night long?"

"I was scared that if I went to sleep, I'd wake up and find it was all a dream and I still go without talking to someone for days outside of work and phonecalls. Han and Leia always blame Callista for the loss of my inoccence but she was only part of the cause. If it'd just been her then I'd still be naïve. What really hurt was when I got out of the state hospital. No one would make eye contact with me. People think it's cordial to look away and speak briefly to avoid staring at the uglies. They don't realize what a isolating and lonely existence it is when nobody looks at your direction. And you resign yourself and say this is it, this is your life now. But when I'm with you I can almost pretend there was no blast and I'm normal."

"Farmboy, you can't be normal. You're too extraordinary for that. I don't want you to be normal cause then you'll be someone different. And you're not getting rid of me that easily. I'm too complex for a dream. "

" Mara Jade, God smiles when he thinks of you. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Know that I am built from death. From head to toe. And it is a corpse that loves you, adores you and will never leave you.  
> \- Erik, Le Fantome D' la Opera (1911)


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And I'm back!! Sorry I took so long but I didn't have any internet connections at home and my computer broke down. Thanks for your patience.

At eight weeks and two days into her pregnancy none of Mara's pants fit without the Bella band anymore. It's highly frustrating though not unwelcome. Women with small frames start showing sooner, according to all those maternity sites. Her stomach's hard which means it's a real bump and not bloating cause bloating is jiggly. What she'd really love is for the baby to start kicking but it's too early for that. After all, it's the size of a cherry at nine weeks. Speaking of red fruits, a jar of strawberry jam would be great right now. Oh crud, the cravings are here. Next she'll want pickles in her ice cream or some other gross food. She hasn't gotten an ultrasound yet, Luke should be present for it. Palpatine said illegitimate children were a blight and the women who carried them brought dishonor to the mother and sire's family. Any hope of Luke accepting her hinges on Palpatine being wrong. He's not answering her phone calls and she's fighting the urge to hitch a ride for his conference in Seattle to check on him. Winter finds out about the pregnancy four days after the "Leia incident" as she calls it. Her best friend puts two and two together when she catches Mara examining the baby's growth in the bathroom, gently palpating her belly's tiny bump. Does no one knock anymore? Winter comes to Mara's apartment the next day with vitamin supplements, pillow shoes, Tums, breastfeeding essentials and a request to be godparent before Leia calls dibs. If Mara dies in childbirth and gets reincarnated, she'd like Winter to be her mother. Her house phone rings all of a sudden.

"Who calls at 11: 30pm on a Thursday night? It better not be Lando with  _another_ apology. Tell me munchkin do you think we should pick up?... Okay, we will. Hello?"

"Hello Mara...... Did you read the book I left you?" _Luke..._

"Where have you been?!? I've been calling you for the last four days!!! I went to your apartment and Leia threatened me with a kitchen knife. I was starting to think you jumped off a skyscraper and Winter lied to keep my sanity intact. Please tell me you're okay...."

"I wouldn't jump off a skyscraper, I could kill somebody on impact!!! You broke my cellphone when you tried to gouge your eyes out. I left my new number on the door of your fridge. Guess you didn't see it. As for Leia that's my fault indirectly: Han and I didn't give her any details, Leia thinks you dumped me for no reason. Also, I had some problems with phantom pain recently and she thinks you triggered it. "

"Honestly, I thought it was a shrink's office number that shared your initials. Don't worry about your sister. If I'd done what Leia thinks I did, she'd be right on killing me. Why are you calling? Not that I'm upset that you called me, I'm gladder than words can say... And I sound pathetic."

"Biggs heard you threw up in the hospital yesterday. Do you need me to nurse you back to health for a few days? Driving distance between New York and Seattle is 41 minutes, I can be there by 9:15pm."

"You're obviating the time difference. 1;00am would be more accurate. And I'm not sick. Um....... "

"Has something happened? You sound agitated, like you're afraid. Did you remember something from.. him?

"Luke....... we're having a baby.

" You're pregnant?.... " _Farmboy, your voice is breaking and I don't know what that means._

"Please say something. I'm not sure if I can do this on my own. The more I research, the more I realize how ill-prepared Palpatine left me for this situation. Part of me is overjoyed and the other is terrified that he damaged me so much I'll somehow hurt the baby and that's the last thing I want because I already love our baby--"

 **"Mara!!** Slow down, you're not letting me answer. Let me clarify a few things. One: every parent is afraid of messing up. Two: you're going to be a great mom. And above all three: There's no way I'm letting you do this alone."

"You don't hate me for shaming your family name with a bastard child?"

" Shame my- Han's right: we do need a time machine to kill that creep before you're born. Stay home, I'm gonna skip the last day of the conference and excuse myself to uncle Ben and Qui-Gon so I can see you and the baby. Are you showing yet? Is there anything you're craving? Have you seen a doctor? "

" Now who's talking too fast? Bump's not visible unless I take my clothes off. Don't drive all night, get some rest and the **biggest** jar of strawberry jam you can find-- Wait _Qui-Gon?As_ in Qui-Gon Jinn, the life coach?

"You've met my shrink? Next you'll say Ben taught you fencing. Tis a small world indeed."

"Is Winter acquainted with Qui-Gon by any chance?"

" Not closely but yeah."  _Celchu, you better have a good excuse for hiding this from me._

"Luke, I'm gonna go to Seattle tomorrow after I talk to Winter. Can you wait that long? "

"I told you my limits on waiting. Remember?"

" I remember. We'll see you soon farmboy. "

" Mara, thank you. "

" Thank you for what exactly? "

"I can now leave with what I never knew: I'm someone to be loved. And that I learned from you."*

" You and your obscure quotations. Goodnight Luke. "

" Goodnight my Dea. I promise to get you the largest jar I can find."

And just like that, a great burden is lifted. Her conversation with Luke leaves her so happy she might just forgive Winter when she confronts her tomorrow morning. Mara sets her alarm clock and goes to sleep. She dreams that night of a baby boy with her red curls and Luke's mazarine blue eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Fosca, Stephen Sondheim's "Passion" (1994)


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Mara confronts Winter who is hosting a unexpected guest

"Winter open up!! I know you're in there!!! Also, you're playing my Anna Netrekbo record and I want it back!!!"

Okay, that last request is more for the baby than her but after knocking on the door for the past half hour since 5:30 am, technicalities are becoming less and less important. Winter knows she wouldn't kill her best friend right? Especially now with the baby coming, when she needs her the most. Celchu is the closest thing she has to a mother figure. Her excitement at the news had been Mara's proof that the baby wouldn't go through what she did with Palpatine. An answer to her prayers for the child to grow up safe and nurtured and loved. The door to Winter's apartment opens.  _Well, it's about time._

"Miss Jade, how delightful to see you again. I take it from Miss Celchu's pleading to renew the charm you enjoyed my gift? She's asleep right now but I'll be happy to wake her if it's urgent."  _Qui-Gon? What the hell are you doing here? Wait he's refusing to reset the spell?!?!_

"If you refuse to give it back then why did you charm me in the first place?"

"Because I owed you a favor but I'm not restoring it."

"You're not making any sense. What favor and why won't you change me back? I was better that way."

"It wasn't real, Miss Jade. We must observe life as it is in order to see life as how it should be."

"Quit the philosophy lessons!!! Tell me the true reason for denying the charm."

"9,377, 148 men* in New York and you choose the one whose family I can never repay. Not that I blame you, Luke is a remarkable man. Every bit the King I promised you. "

"You have five minutes to explain before I use you as a punching bag."

" It's a long story. Best you come in and sit down cause this will take a while."

Qui-Gon leads her to the couch, offers buttered toast with orange slices and spins a tale of hardship and brotherhood. Turns out Qui-Gon Jinn is a pen name, his real name is Liam  **Kenobi.** He confirms that sweet little Rey Kenobi is his brother's grandchild.  _Luke's right: tis a small world indeed._ Their parents died when Qui-Gon was 12 and Ben was 6. Due to the age difference, the brothers were separated by the state. Qui-Gon aged out of the British foster system at 18 and dedicated every waking moment to finding his little brother. He describes himself as bitter, cynical and angry with the world. A far cry from the calm, gentle giant from the library elevator. For eighteen years his search was fruitless. Until one day he received a call from a woman named _Padmé Amidala,_ telling him Ben was at the Montana state hospital, recovering from minor burns sustained in the Gulf War. He dropped everything else, hopped a plane and drove nonstop from the New York airport to Montana, where he was met with a sight that changed him forever.

"I expected my brother to be alone, hardened and miserable as I had been. Instead I found two children singing "Dites Moi" to their beloved Uncle Ben. Those children were Luke and Leia Skywalker. Next to my brother was the man who saved his life. Twenty three year old Anakin Skywalker shielded Ben from a IED blast. Because of this, he lost both his legs and was permanently disfigured. Despite this, he smiled at me and suddenly I felt like the most horrible person who ever lived. There I was: a perfectly healthy man cursing the universe, assuming the worst of people while this family had loved my brother as one of their own and were welcoming me with arms wide open. I swore to become a man worthy of the love they gave us and I've never had cause to regret it. "

" So without the Skywalker family, you'd be a lonely miser and none of your work would exist. "

" That's problably true. Also, Anakin's sister in law Beru introduced me to my wife."

"You know, about a week after she'd settled in with her grandfather, Rey said she had the perfect man for me but her grandpa didn't think I would date him."

"Would you have fallen in love with young Luke had you seen his physical self from the beginning?"

 _I would have run away from the mere sight of him._ "I'm not sure. Lately I haven't been certain of anything."

"Not even the child you're carrying? If you want to keep it secret a little longer, stop placing your hand on your stomach. That's a dead giveaway for soon to be mothers."

"Luke's confident I'll be a great mom. In my opinion, he'll be a greater dad. He loves children, he always wanted one. "

" Luke is the father?!? "

" He's the only man I've ever knowingly made love with so yes. "

" Your condition changes things. As an orphan, I can't allow that child to grow up fatherless. Especially if said father wants to be involved."

"So you'll reset the charm?"

"I'm going to give you a choice: The conference starts at eleven. Luke is staying at my brother's house. Here are the directions for both places. If you're at the conference at opening time, I'll reset the charm when the day is done. If you go to Ben's house then you see Luke as he is. Whatever happens victory is yours, but choose wisely Miss Jade. There's only one scenario where you, the child **and** Luke win."

"How will I know which path to take?"

"If you truly love him, your heart will tell you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *New York population demographics 2015-2016.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait. I got hit with the flu and spent a whole week in bed rest coughing my brains out. Hope this makes up for it.

I _am **never** going on a road trip with Katarn's whiny ass again _ floats through her head for the billionth time. Winter had woken up at seven am with a smile on her face. Qui-Gon left shortly after giving "Dear Miss Celchu" an explanation followed by a fond farewell. The next ten minutes became a frenzy of texts to see who could drive them asap. Kyle was the first to answer his phone. He said yes as soon as he caught up with events and borrowed his mother's minivan. The man had been all for reuniting her with Luke until she told him the specifics. Apparently Kyle thought he was driving to Ben Kenobi's house. Once he found out their destination was Qui-Gon Jinn's conference, he politely called Mara an idiot. Winter proclaimed herself Switzerland and kept her nose buried under Arthur Miller's The Crucible.

"For the record: I think you're making a mistake. "

" Kyle, you wanna do me a favor and please _shut up?"_

"Jade, you are not allowed to kill me in my mom's car. Capische?"

"Katarn, killing you while you're driving, with a witness is sloppy at best and hopelessly moronic at worst."

"Would it be absolutely nuts? Yeah but at least it'd have guts. This course of action: it's cowardly. You're taking the easy way out."

"Oh, so it's unscrupulous to want an angelic visage over a misshapen one. Thanks for the fortune cookie wisdom Master Kyle."

"It's unscrupulous for him to see the worst of you while you'll only let yourself see the best. Angels aren't defined by beauty, otherwise they wouldn't have to tell people _**be not afraid.**  _What defines angels is the purity of their love."

 _Damn, that's a really good answer._ Mara informs Kyle that her decision is final. Between Winter's cold (deeply disappointed) silence, Kyle's bluntly sharp arguments and Mini- Skywalker provoking dizzy spells from within her body the rest of the trip seems a lot longer than the 22 minutes it actually took. Kyle leaves Mara at the building where the conference is being held and drives off with Winter to leave her at Ben Kenobi's place. Both of them are exaggerating. It's not like she's hurting Luke by seeing him through rose colored glasses. But what if one of his scars reopened? That occurred to a veteran in a movie she saw once. What if she treated said wound incorrectly because she couldn't see it? That would be hurtful. And what about the baby? She was still spellbound when it was conceived. Can the charm be inherited from the womb? And if it isn't what will happen when he or she goes to school? There's no way she's putting the baby in homeschooling after the socially crippling side effects it gave her. But Mara can't give an accurate description of Luke if a teacher asks for one and that'll raise questions. But what other choice is there realistically speaking? In fiction people root for Quasimodo but in real life everyone selects Phoebus and lives to regret it later. She opens her Nancy Drewesque pocketbook purse and grabs an antique gold rosary with white pearls that would definitely get stolen if someone found out the pearls are real and prays.

For Palpatine God was a hangman for the damned. He had never believed in Divinity itself so much as the fear Our Lord provoked in mere mortals. Faith was a tool for him to manipulate revolutionary and obsequious people alike. The first time he saw her praying, he told her not to place high hopes upon the intangible for it would bring little joy. That religiosity was for the meek and she belonged to the strong. Therefore her preocupation with holiness was better spent on contributing to their family's legacy. It had been their only disagreement about anything. For Luke God was a teacher who strove to illuminate the world he laboriously crafted. She caught him in Church one Sunday night, kneeling before the face of Saint Francis of Assisi. He had seemed almost beatific that moment as the dim candlelight was captured by his cerulean eyes. For Luke faith was proof of man's ability to cast aside our darker instincts for something greater than ourselves. He claimed piety was a delicate affair. That one must be careful to avoid confusing our thirst for glory with God's will for he cares not for earthly recognition. It was a startling contrast to Palpatine's ideology and she thought it marvelous.

"Domine Iesu, dimitte nobis debita nostra. Salva nos ab igne inferiori. Perduc in caelum omnes animas, praesertim was, quae misericordiae tuae maxime indigent."*  _Oh Blessed Virgin give me a sign._

"Mara, what are you doing out here at 8:00 am in the morning? It's freezing outside."  _Heavenly Mother, I prayed for a sign not Leia!!! Wait something's different about her..._

"Why are you being nice to me all of a sudden?? Last time we saw each other, you threatened to kill me."

"Han enlightened me on the situation. With your permission I'd like to apologize for jumping to conclusions about you. I can be a little overprotective."  _That's an understatement._

"There's nothing to forgive. You and Han are Ursus, protecting kind Lygia from Rome's raging bull.* I can't hate you for that."

"Luke's favorite character in that book was Eunice. Mine was Marcus Vinicius. Growing up, I never understood why Luke loved tragedy so much. On our third grade hero assignment I chose George Washington for my role model and Luke chose Saint Thomas Beckett cause he died _defending the honor of God._ Aunt Sabé said that he couldn't help it cause he was born old. Which confused me cause I was born five minutes before him. It wasn't until the war that I understood what she meant."

"What did she mean by that?"

"That since infancy he knew what most people spend lifetimes trying to comprehend."

"I don't suppose you know what Luke sees in me cause I can't figure it out. Have we stooped so low that a man that wonderful settles for the first girl who kisses him on the cheek? "

" My brother is many things but he's not desperate for female companionship. If anything for the past few years he's been defined as a hopeless romantic who knows romance is hopeless for people like him. Trust me when I tell you Luke wouldn't stay with a bitch. Even if you shagged him every night."

"What do shag carpets have with relationships? And why are you laughing?"

"Mara, forgive me for saying this but you just confirmed what Han thinks about you is accurate."

"And what exactly does the great Han Solo think about me?"

"My husband thinks you're Sandra Dee, Queen Pentheselia and Anna Pavlova rolled into one. "

" I take that as a compliment."

"Good, just don't tell anyone Han likes ballet and Greek mythology. He has a reputation to keep."

"Leia?..."

"Is there something you'd like to ask?"

"Suppose you'd never met Han, would you have stopped believing in love?"

**"Absolutely not!!!"**

"How come?"

"I have living, breathing proof of true love. Turn around and you'll catch a glimpse of it."

Mara follows the suggestion in order to amuse Leia. She sees a legless, bald man in a wheelchair. Lack of hair is the least of this man's physical woes. His skin dons a mottled, pinkish appearance from the scars that cover his body. He has no nose or eyebrows and his ears look like they melted away. She's wondering if Leia steered her to this mystery man as a joke when Padmé Amidala shows up and suddenly it's impossible for this figure to be anyone but Anakin Skywalker. Because the way he gazes at her is exactly the same as what she saw in that Montana kitchen. This is a man no one in their right mind would call handsome but if the look in her eyes is anything to go by, to Padmé he is beauty itself. The reason for Han and Leia's hating Callista has just become painfully obvious. With parents like that, the twins probably grew up believing love lasted forever. In their naivety Luke and Leia's mindscape would have thought Padmé the golden rule of romance. They found out through tragedy that she had always been the exception. But she shouldn't be the rarity. Anger management issues aside, Anakin is a great guy. The charm wouldn't have made him breathtakingly beautiful otherwise. But society is so flawed that they'll choose kriffing Rush Clovis over both Skywalkers because they don't fit their stupid model of Aryan perfection.... And just like that, she knows which path to walk. If she can't see Luke the way Padmé sees Anakin then she never deserved him at all.

"Leia, I need a favor. Could you drive me to Ben Kenobi's house? I only have a few hours to get there in time."

"Hold on, just what is so important that you'd make both of us skip the conference?"

"Aldonza needs to save Don Quixote from reality, she can't bear to be anything but Dulcinea anymore."

"Hop in."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *The Fatima prayer in ecclesiastical Latin.  
> *Quo vadis by Henryk Sienkiewicz (1895), my favorite movie version of the book is the 1951 film with Robert Taylor and Deborah Kerr.
> 
> This chapter is dedicated to Carrie Fisher who forsook her earthly career this december in exchange for a blessed immortality. Fly onto the bosom of the Force, knowing you are remembered.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I have written and rewritten this chapter a dozen times.

Upon first glance Ben Kenobi, the man who inexplicably tied her life to Luke's by existing is normal. In hindsight, she doesn't know what she was expecting him to be. Some hermit translating ancient texts in the middle of nowhere? Certainly not the kind elderly man welcoming her like she was family. He gazes at her like he was reading her soul, then he smiles as if he was pleased by what he found. His life story is reflected on the pictures spread over the living room. Top of his Class in Cambridge. Major in the British Army, loyal friend to Captain Anakin Skywalker of the U.S army and godfather to said man's son. Fencing teacher for thirty years. Loving husband to Siri Tachi, doting father to a young woman with Rey's eyes who died with her husband in a car crash. Apparently he entered the Catholic priesthood after his wife died, stating that none could replace his beloved Siri and sex is overrated anyway, he had married for love not mindless fornicating. Whenever someone asks if he regrets it, he quips that God needs all the well educated followers available. Men like him are a vanishing breed. The most recent photograph features his granddaughter acting as assistant mechanic to Han Solo and Chewbacca. _Luke probably took that picture. He always wants to take the photos._ All in all Benjamin Kenobi is...sagely. Not the fake 80's televangelist sagely, more like Richard Harris's Albus Dumbledore sagely.

Winter shows up and the shock on her face is priceless. The unadulterated joy that brightens the day when she comes back to her senses equally so. Leia pulls Winter into a sisterly hug, shortly after that Luke's sister starts talking about someone named Tycho who is supposedly perfect for her cousin. Beneath all her rough exterior, Leia Skywalker Solo is a hopeless romantic. Frank Liszt's Liebestraum is echoing through the walls, too pure for a recording. Mara's gut tells her Luke is near the piano. She follows the music and hears little Rey humbly requesting a break from her piano lessons. Wait a minute: Six year old Rey is the one playing? Julliard uses that piece as an advanced pedaling study. How do the Skywalkers and Kenobis transmit so much genius into three generations? _Oh God, with a family like that my baby's going to recite Marcus Aurelius before kindergarten._ Mara stays outside the room, it feels wrong to interrupt them. From this angle, she can't get a decent look without moving closer which would give away her position. Rey finishes the piece and she can hear munching. Luke and Han have a habit of carrying snacks under the pretense of "emergency food" but really they just pack them for the kids.

"Okay, Miss Kenobi today's concert merits a 9.5 out of 10. Does this seem fair to you?"

"Come on Luke, I practiced all week to show you my progress and all I don't get the five stars. Didn't you like it?"

"It was lovely but on the second cadenza you played E-flat when the first note should be E-natural. I want you to work on that."

"Yes sir. When can we get to Prokofiev? I wanna play his march for Three Oranges. Did you know in medieval and Byzantine art Oranges represented free will? Do you think Prokofiev chose a fairytale with oranges to tell everybody he believed in freedom?"

"Rey, you're a bonafide Clarisse McClellan."*

"Is that a bad thing?"

"On the contrary, it means you're worth a hundred thousand Mildreds."

"Luke, are you taking ballet lessons?"

"No, why do you ask?"

"Cause my ballet teacher's right behind us."

 _House Kenobi: Loyal, clever and far too observant for their own good. No more Tolkien for me._ Silent as a ghost, she walks into the room towards them. She keeps her eyes to the floor, steeling herself for the inevitable. The corner of her eye catches a glimpse of his hand as he softly tells Rey to give them a moment alone. Part of her is tempted to deny this reality. Claim that Luke's hand isn't red and blistered, identical to the protagonist's In V for Vendetta because she can't bear the thought of him being ostracized for something beyond his control. He rises and ever so slowly, his heavily scarred palm gently tilts her head up and she sees him. The first thing she notices is that he shares Anakin's lack of eyebrows but unlike his father, Luke still has a nose, still has a head full of hair even though it doesn't shine the way she remembers. His face mirrors the state of his hand. Malformed vermilion crisscrossing with pallid, distorted lines. A misshapen pattern that spreads all the way down to his neck, lower if his clothing is anything to go by. JesusChrist, just how vulnerable did he make himself when he took off his shirt for her?

Tentatively, she places her hand on his dark golden locks in a reverse situation of Beauty and the Beast. He smiles and twin sapphires dance with jubilant hope as he lovingly touches the nearly inexistent curve where the baby is growing.  _There you are farmboy._ It's still her Luke in there. Luke who sees the best of people in spite of everything. Luke who has Galahad's piety, Atticus Finch's integrity and Horatio Hornblower's self doubt that never overpowers his sense of duty. And in that moment Luke Skywalker is more than a disfigured veteran, more than fate's unfortunate victim, more than a mere human being. To Mara Jade he is the embodiment of love. And love is not sought after for its indefectibility. 

"I missed you my Gwynplaine."

"And I you my Dea."

"So what comes next? Do we file for joint custody or do we- ?"

"I ask of my lady that I may be allowed to serve her. That I may hold her in my heart. That I may dedicate each victory and call upon her in defeat. And if at last I give my life I give it in the sacred name of Lady Mara."*

"You finally quote something I know and all that comes to mind is that it should be Dulcinea at the end. Oh my gosh is that tiny box housing what I think it is? "

" No worries, I didn't get it out of a cereal box. Then again I don't think anyone eats cereal worth two month's salary except Paris Hilton. It's your choice though, I'm not going to force you into doing anything."

"Mara Jade Skywalker: it suits me well."

They kiss and the rest of the world fades away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Clarisse and Mildred are characters from Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451.  
> *Man of La Mancha  
> That's all folks. After this I'll post the epilogue once it's finished. Hope you enjoyed reading.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As we reach the final chapter I would like to remind you all to be the change you want to see in the world this 4th of July. Luke's behavior throughout the whole fic and his confession to Mara in chapter 11 is based on multiple testimonies from actual disfigured veterans and their struggle with reentering society. The burn camp in chapter 4 and 10 exists, I learned about it when my cousin started working there in college some years ago: Burn camps are an opportunity for young people who have suffered burn injuries, to meet others, share experiences and improve self esteem. Their focus on physical challenges is based on evidence that if young people with scars, who may not feel good about how their bodies look, can feel good about what their bodies can do, then this helps them have a better body image and higher self esteem. Volunteer at one if you can. Remember no man or woman is born useless.  
> Have a lovely 4th of July and never forget the Force will be with us: always.

October 1st, 2021

A recently divorced actress named Cray Mingla waits for the rain to clear so she can enjoy her free day at New York. She is currently working at the St James Theatre in 44th street. She'd turned down a role in Tennessee William's "The Glass Menagerie" this February. Laura had unearthed memories best left forgotten. Memories of a white hospital bed, bloodshot cerulean eyes and a hand straight out of a horror movie reaching out to her. Begging her to stay, telling her "you're the only woman I've ever loved". Beseeching her to commit Padme Amidala's mistake all over again. Mrs. Skywalker was(is) a Wagnerian soprano. Her parents immigrated from Greece with their many, many daughters, A musical prodigy, at 14 Padme Amidala Naberrie had been the youngest Brunnhilde to ever grace the stage. She married Anakin Skywalker: captain of the football team, president of the student council. Popular, tall, ambitious and extremely loyal to his so-called angel. Everyone thought they'd be famous: the future astronaut and the diva. They had everything going for them: good grades, good looks, promising careers. But then he had to join the army and get himself blown up. The next Kirsten Flagstad became a simple music teacher to stay by her husband, unwilling to abandon him even as Rush Clovis swore he would love her children as his own. Mingla still remembers the first time she saw Anakin Skywalker's unfortunate face. How the man had somehow noticed her well-hidden disgust as she crossed the street. Shortly afterwards she'd seen Rush Clovis's handsome features. What possessed Mrs. Skywalker to choose the crippled, hideous farmer over the rich, sinfully pleasing lawyer? She hadn't understood it as Callista Ming, ten years and two name changes later she remains perplexed at Padme's decision.

Her mind allows a nostalgic pang for the youth she once loved. If she's honest with herself, she admits her relationship problems stem from comparing every man she dates with Luke Skywalker and many men fall short to the mere thought of him. Her Luke, not the monstrous shell bearing his name and memories. The handsome, romantic, intelligent boy who said they were Perceval and Blanchefleur. The only boy her age unwilling to stay in their crappy little towns where nothing ever happens. True, he wanted to come back and visit for every birthday, holidays and other occasions but that was manageable. Yes, barring Darklighter his friends were less than desirable (Vader's hands clasping her throat is a moment she cannot erase) but they were childhood friends, he'd outgrow them in time. He'd been so oblivious to how beautiful he was, caught up in his books and vinyl and plane models. When Luke joined the army she knew he ran the risk of following in his father's footsteps. She'd begged him to reconsider and find another job. He'd replied that his service wasn't a job, it was a duty. One he felt called to for reasons he didn't fully comprehend yet felt he had to follow. When he was taken hostage she prayed for him and Biggs*. When they came back with medals she kissed her fiancée so deeply that if not for Galen walking in on them, both of them would have lost their virginities. God, she was proud of him that day as the governor placed the Legion Of Merit upon his neck. He had exceeded all expectations, no one in Chad or Naboo had ever won such a prestigious award. It was sure to get him places, all he needed now was to end his military service and they could start their new lives together. The actress and the pilot, the ones who crossed over. A story fit for Hollywood if they played their cards right and kept their image clean. She suggested Luke to claim he had PTSD so he could be honorably discharged. He might have listened if not for Sergeant Wedge Antilles who expressed his eagerness to serve beside the newly minted Commander. Luke took his position and served with honor, chivalry and faith. Three years later the letters stopped, it wasn't long after that her worst fear was confirmed: history had repeated itself.

The choice was simple: stay, marry Luke Skywalker and become the next Padme Amidala or go forth where her predecessor failed to move forward. She'd refused to let herself fade into nothingness. Walked bravely as she left her small town with an empty bank account and fought back the tears as people who used to be friends called her a heartless bitch. Easy for them to say: none of them would have had to introduce a scarred mess to people at the grocery store or a restaurant and receive pitiful gazes for the rest of their lives. People take pity on Susan Kay's Phantom but no one in their right mind would sleep with Erik, much less marry him. She has no doubt that day was her river of no return. That moment in which she inadvertently exchanged one tragedy for another. The swift current of water hurled by a car brings her back to reality. Cold seeps in through her, sending involuntary shivers. Does no one know to drive in this hellhole? Or are New Yorkers just inherently rude? What kind of person sprays a bystander like that? Pea-brained, egotistical-

"Miss do you need an umbrella? _Who said that?_

She finds her answer as an adorable little boy with sapphire-like eyes stands before her. His skin is pale, shining like a pearl's reflection under the moonlight but the true glow lies in the smile freely offered to her. Perhaps there's some hope left for New York after all. The most striking feature about him is his red-gold hair, thick and vibrant curls that move effortlessly as he reaches into his pocket to give her the aforementioned umbrella. What a compassionate soul, certainly better than the good-for-nothing brats she taught drama to last summer. Half their age, more than thrice the class.

"Ben!!! What made you take off like that sweetie??" _That must be his mother. I can see where he got the hair from._

"I went to give the lady an umbrella so the car wouldn't splash her again mommy."

"Next time tell me before you run off so I don't get scared okay."

"Okay mommy but can the lady dry up at home pleaseee."

"Ben, you have your daddy's heart and your aunt's focus."

The woman presents herself as Mara Jade and she nearly gasps in surprise. Mara Jade and her cousin Korkie Kryze were on the 2018 cover of Fortune Magazine in an article spanning six pages. They were being praised for their defense of human rights, albeit in different circles. Korkie was hailed for denouncing abortion in the lower classes as a governmental resource against poverty in Latin America. His health center earned the approval of CEB*, the Peace Corps and UNICEF. Mara was the outspoken leader of Veteran's rights, the petite ballerina who wiped the floor with Congress. Her camera-shy husband never showed up in any photos but he showed his support to his wife's efforts in private interviews and his own charity work that begun before they even met. Bernie Sanders said on record he would happily endorse "Mrs. Mara or her brave Commander" if any of them ever ran for President after the three worked together to pass the 2019 Veteran's bill that finally granted reconstructive surgery to disfigured soldiers. Callista had avoided that particular photo, a whole bunch of deformed vets presenting a united front was NOT her idea of a pic for the ages. (Especially since _**"Luke Skywalker"**_ was one of the names mentioned on the radio's take of that historic event.) Time Magazine called them "Satine Kryze's legacy and Sheev Palpatine's redemption", claimed the flames in the cousins's hair were pittance compared to the fire in their souls. Conclusion: she's standing next to a bonafide celebrity which means she doesn't think twice about accepting her son's invitation.

 

Mara Jade's generosity extends further than she expected when the multi-billionaire/activist/ballerina lends her a dress while the drenched skirt and blouse are taken care of. When she thanks her again Mara claims it's nothing and offhandedly remarks her husband would have done the same thing, though it definitely would have been more awkward. Her chosen life partner must not be a New Yorker then, maybe he's Canadian. Folks from Canada are said to be ten times kinder than the average American. Ben asks if she wants to see his not-yet-finished "Lego Castle" while they wait for his father to come home and Cray lets the sweet child lead her to what she thinks will be five or six building pieces put together in a jejune fashion. Instead she marvels at the sight of an expert level castle most children could only dream of constructing. Heck, most grownups couldn't put together something so elaborate if their lives depended on it. /p>

"Did you make this all by yourself Ben?"

"No, daddy and I built it together. He says when it's done it'll be the tenth wonder of the world."

"Oh? And what's the ninth wonder of the world according to your father?"

"Me, mommy and my little sister." _Does this guy have a single brother I can date?_

Her conversation with Ben is abruptly canceled once Ben hears the door click open. Quick as the Tasmanian Devil he runs to greet his father. The boy's mother halts him midcourse and tells Ben to take his socks off so he doesn't slide and hit the wall. He protests it only happened "one time" but once is enough for her to be cautious. Honestly, she can't blame Mara for being a little overprotective around her son. The boy fits the "cinnamon roll" trope to perfection and in their world people like that don't last long so it's better to keep him close. If Anakin and Padme had the same awareness then she would probably have a blue-eyed beauty of her own to hold and cherish. Amidalas were fertile as sin, Luke's mother had undoubtedly prevented two to four children from existing when she cut her tubes after the twins were born. Three children is more than enough she'd said, counting her adopted son as always. Maybe that's the real motive behind her staying with that Mason Verger look-alike: Galen had no blood relatives left so unlike the twins nobody was obligated to look after him, Anakin was the one with a legal claim over the boy since he was his godfather. Padme was just the wife, ergo unable to file for custody without presenting a strong case she couldn't afford with her meager salary. The woman must have pictured a billion worst-cases scenarios in which her children were separated from one another and decided it wasn't worth the risk. After all, Luke's bleeding heart had to come from somewhere. 

"Hello Callista. It's been a while, hasn't it?" _I know that voice... What is HE doing here? Is he a family friend coming for dinner? A work companion Mara or her husband invited out of pity? What's going on?_

"Hi Luke. Yeah it's been a while. How's life treated you?" _Really: you're a professional actress and THAT'S the best you can come up with?_

"My life's been pretty great, I have no grand list of complaints."

"Then you've been luckier than me. My list is miles long and the words are bold black. I have no idea how to wipe the slate clean"

"You can start by turning around instead of avoiding a hateful gaze that's never existed." _You always did think the best of people, it shouldn't surprise me that you chose to forgive rather than loathe me over what could have been..._

Cray Mingla nee Callista turns to see the man she'd envisioned growing old with once upon a time. Not a single person could reconcile this image with that worn before the veneer of perfection cracked. The rough scarring that covers him whole hasn't improved much other than the fact it's less bloated. His eyebrows are still gone, the left side of his nose is missing a chunk and it's a safe bet to assume he keeps his dark golden hair so long to hide the visible part of his right cheekbone. Such a shame, he was so beautiful. He's dressed more scantily than she'd expected, he wears a partially unbuttoned dress shirt with open sleeves where her mind pictured baggy sweaters to maintain public humiliation to a bare minimum. Luke has left his butchered epidermis unapologetically revealed for all to see. Has he lost all sense of propriety since their last encounter?!? There's a wonderful little boy here who shouldn't be exposed to a stranger's disfigurement without consulting his parents. Is it a hobby of his nowadays to mentally scar little kids?

"Daddy, tell miss Mingla her clothes are dry now."

"Will do champ. Anything else Ben?"

"Aunt Leia's bringing Hannah back at 7:00."

"Good, that way she and your cousins can have dinner with us. Did you brush your teeth?"

"Yes daddy."

"Did you wash your hands?"

"Yes daddy."

"Did you put your toys away?"

"Ummmm..."

"Well run along then, you don't want Uncle Han and Aunt Leia to clean things up do you?"

"No, uncle Han is clumsy: he'll break something and then he'll feel bad about it."

"Then off you go."

That brief conversation and what it implies distills a cold worthy of Antarctica within her haggard spirit that stays as Ben heads out to clean his room. **_Luke is married, Luke has a child of his own._** She knows Ben is his biological son: that lovely boy inherited his father's mazarine blue eyes, his dimples, his gifted brain and empathetic nature. Deep down she was aware of it right from the beginning yet she'd refused to acknowledge the possibility. Luke in her mind was the tragic victim of destiny: the kindly man who would babysit the neighbor's kids without a qualm but never gave a straight answer when one of his charges asked why he wasn't married while everyone his age had kids, was divorced and/or married already. In her mind Luke Skywalker stayed in Naboo and crop-dusted for a living. He spent his afternoons sipping lemonade with Vader and Biggs, the three eternal bachelors (each permanently single for different reasons)* joking around whilst the hours flew. Eventually the kids would stop asking why nobody ever dated him and learn the unavoidable truth: certain girls don't reach their high-school goals and certain boys are meant to be alone. He'd become a doting uncle if Leia found a man willing to endure her blazing temper, to the point where Leia would joke about the Lannister family cause he was so present in their lives. When his nieces or nephews grew up and reproduced he'd take on the mantle of storyteller/fatherly figure for all/local legend as did his father before him. It never occurred to her that somebody would change how the story ended, much less someone like Mara Jade who unlike Padme had no fond memories of before. Mara Jade could have any man she pleased, she deliberately chose the man nobody wanted. How on earth did it happen?

"I don't know how it happened. I don't know what convinced that wondrous Valkyrie of maidenkind to picture me in a romantic light. But from the moment I met her something changed for the better, she kindled what I thought would never set aflame with no hesitation or pity. Just the earnest candor of her love. All I need to know is that I love her, I love Mara and Ben and Hannah more than speech can say or words can express. To my eternal gratitude the feeling is mutual."

"Great you're psychic now."

"No, I've simply learned to read people's eyes thoroughly so I can know how they really think and feel in regards to me."

"Is Hannah your biological daughter as well?"

"Yes, she's three months old now. Hannah got my hair and her mother's emerald eyes. That little girl kicked a lot harder than her brother. Mara's cousin was overjoyed cause there hadn't been a girl in the family for over 20 years. Of course it didn't top my parent's reaction when we told them about Ben. Few things perk older couples more than grandchildren."

"They should have been our children."

"They _could_ have been had events played out differently but they have a mother. One who loves them unconditionally, who would walk barefoot to hell for them. A dedication I have yet to see in you."

"We were young and sheltered Luke, I wasn't trying to hurt you but we would have ended up hating each other had I stayed. There would have been nothing left of us save resentment, anger, unbridled frustration that everything had come apart so quickly with no way to retrieve what was lost."

"And what remains now?"

"The want of forgiveness, the unrelenting desire to start over and make amends so that I may find peace."

"Fallen angels need only seek God to find redemption but they have little right to ask clemency from their victims."

"I recall you were more inclined to tales of valor than angels."

"Indeed Commander Skywalker was fond of knights, philosophy and poems of idealistic context. Callista Ming was the one who preferred physical comedians, modern dramas and purple prose."

"You speak in past tense, as if it were a ghost that stands beside me. I've not spent years searching for myself and a man who resembles a shade."

"Oh but you did. You can never find Commander Skywalker again, he died in Iraq under the desert's torrid shoals and Callista Ming was buried with him. But I convey no falsehood when I wish for Cray Mingla to find the peace I have gained with Mara Jade."

Damn it Skywalker you put me to shame without even trying. Mara's gaze when both of them open the door is proof that Luke's wife heard long enough to get the gist of their conversation. She waits for the burning comments, the taunts, the clamors for her to leave the home she and Luke built together lest she disrupt their happy little family. They never come, Mara directs the whole of her focus to the man each of them courted. Jade tells him "I'm so proud of you farmboy" and squeezes the organic hand that feels like sandpaper if her memory is faithful. Murmurs softly into his ear and smiles as Luke's probably-rough lips graze her forehead, a galaxy's weight in love wrapped around that seemingly casual gesture. The message rings loud and clear: You're not important enough for us to hate.  Callista Ming is nothing than a bygone dream's faded epitaph, hardly worth the effort required to muster up a significant amount of wrath. The new Mr. and Mrs. Skywalker found happily ever after, something Cray Mingla can only dream of. She waves goodbye to Ben (Of course you named your son after Ben Kenobi: the man was practically a second father to you). The sweet boy says farewell in a tone giving away that he's oblivious to her "complicated" past with his father. She rapidly changes back into her clothes, utterly convinced Leia might burn them (or her) if Luke's twin arrives before she leaves. Races out of the building, grateful she chose to wear flats instead of high heels. Once she's past the danger zone she sits on a bench to wait for the bus and cries for what could have been. 

"A beautiful woman shouldn't be crying alone in a bus stop. Is there any way I can help you miss?"

"Back off Gigantor, you're too old for me."

"No worries on that field, I'm happily married and even if my relationship with Tahl wasn't a joyous one I wouldn't risk castration by committing adultery."

"Nice to know chivalry's not completely dead. My name's Cray Mingla, actress and part time drama teacher."

"We've met before, you helped my daughter Ahsoka practice for her school play. She was most thankful for your help."

"Liam, how good to see you again. How's the psychology business going?"

"Quite well, thank you for asking. May I inquire as to the cause of your tears?"

"A long-run consequence of my vanity, which I am unable to shed. Because of this a great love was irretrievably lost to me."

 "If you want I have a cure for vanity. I call it "Ripping Off The Veil". The process consists of a slight de-brainwashing that erases Occidental prejudices of beauty. Hence the name, for I cast away the shallow curtain society forces upon us with television, fashion models, movies, etcetera."

"Does it work?"

"I've applied it on several subjects, men and women indiscriminately though each received this method years apart from the last. All of them were satisfied with the end result."

 _Eh, why not? It's not like I have anything to lose._ "Work your magic Liam."

"Think of a time you were unforgivingly shallow. How disturbing that you found a memory so quick. Perhaps I should have done this to you when we last met. Regardless of that, from this moment you will no longer view the physical over the spirit. Good, very good. That's it." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *See "Origin Stories and deleted scenes from Ripping Off The Veil", Han's chapter.  
> *Conferencia Episcopal de Bolivia  
> *See Luke's chapter in "Origins Stories and deleted scenes from Ripping Off The Veil".  
> Hands out tin cup: Comments pleaseeee?

**Author's Note:**

> I know, I know. A new story when "Twilight sees all" & "Strengthened by bitterness" aren't finished!!! But the idea was stuck in my head, so I had to write it. Hope it's somewhat readable. Please comment or kudos.


End file.
